11 Childhood Things That Would Cost As Much As Blue Ivy's VMAs Dress... Eventually

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$10,950. That is how much Blue Ivy’s VMA dress reportedly cost her super famous mom and dad. Although, if I had to guess, I would think that the talented pair got that dress for free for the night like most celebrities do for awards shows. But let’s pretend for a second that Beyonce and Jay-Z actually shelled out almost $11,000 for a dress that their young daughter would wear for a total of four hours. Shocking? Maybe. However, it’s likely not the first big ticket item this celebrity tot has had in her possession, and I like to think about the lives of these celebrities’ kids in relation to my own. Like, what in my childhood ever cost $11,000? Not much, I can tell you that. But, with a little bit of brain power and a handy calculator, I did come up with a few things from my childhood that cost as much as Blue Ivy’s VMA dress.

Kids are expensive. Especially famous kids. And, even though I may have spent my Sunday nights reading Baby-Sitters Club books in bed, it doesn’t mean that I didn’t cost my parents a pretty penny. I’m sure I did, even if they never complained about it. (Much.) But it also probably took a lot more of the things that were expensive to even come close to the cost of Blue Ivy’s dress.

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Let’s take a little nostalgic walk down memory lane and revisit all of the things that cost our parents a fortune when we were growing up.

1. Summer Theater Camp

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This was, by far, the biggest expense my parents had to pay when I was growing up. This has to come close to the cost of Blue Ivy’s dress, right? Wrong. Three weeks at a theater camp in the Catskills cost $3,000. It would have taken almost four summers at Stagedoor to come close to Blue’s dress. Fortunately for my parents’ bank account, I only went twice.

2. Trips to Disney World

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Family vacations cost a small fortune. Especially when they involve theme parks and standing in line for hours waiting for Mickey’s signature. (Sorry, dad.) But, even at the old day rate (I swear I remember the tickets once cost $60), we would have had to spend 183 days in Disney World to spend as much money as that gorgeous dress. Not that I would have minded. That just means more signatures.

3. Saturday Donuts

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It was a tradition: I would wake up on the weekends to find a bright shiny box of donuts waiting for me to dig in to. I’m sure that cost my mother a lot. But even at $5 a box, for the same cost as that stunning dress, my mother could have bought us a dozen donuts a week for 42 years. Um, that means I’d still be getting free donuts.

4. Back To School Supplies

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We weren’t exactly rolling in the dough when I was growing up, so back-to-school shopping meant Labor Day sales and flipping through the clearance racks. But, for the sake of fairness, let’s say my parents dropped $200 on clothes and supplies every school year. If that’s the case, they could have either bought me that amazing VMA dress or they could have paid for back-to-school supplies for 55 years. Obviously, they chose wrong.

5. Baseball Tickets

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Baseball was a summer staple in my family. Whether we were staying local or visiting family, if it was the summer, there was always baseball involved. But, even if they spent $50 on a ticket four times in a summer, it would have taken them 55 summers of baseball to come close to Blue Ivy’s dress.

6. My Allowance

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$3 a week. Yeah, I’d be getting that until I was 70 if my parents had been willing to shell out the same amount of money as Beyoncé and Jay-Z were.

7. Baby-Sitters Club Books

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Let’s pretend for a minute that these books didn’t cost $3.95 back in 1995 and were the price they are today at $10.99. If that were the case, my parents could have bought me 1,000 of them. Get writing, Ann M. Martin.

9. Groceries

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I’m guessing groceries for our entire family cost around $200 a week back in the mid-‘90s. If that were the case, I’d still be eating on my parents’ dime before we came close to Blue Ivy's dress.

10. Trips To Visit My Grandparents

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Trips to grandparent-friendly climates are expensive, but nearly as expensive as that dress. I could have visited my grandparents 36 times for the same price.

11. Prom Dresses

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Here’s where the real comparison comes in, because, instead of calling up designers for dresses, my mom took me shopping at Macy’s for most of my formal wear. I don’t remember anything costing more than $100, but let’s be generous and say $200. I would have been dancing my heart out for 55 proms if that had been the case. Or maybe I would have just bought a better dress. One that wasn’t very yellow and very sequin-y.

So maybe my parents never dropped $11,000 on me at one time, but it’s all relative, right?

Image: Giphy (11)