Tinder Horror Stories

Have you had an awesome experience with Tinder? A terrible one? One so comical you can hardly believe it happened in real life? Are you burning with the urge to tell someone all about it, but wary of doing so, lest it impact your life in a negative fashion? Well, you’re in luck: Tinderfessions is here, and it's ready to listen to everything you’ve got — as long as you don’t mind the entire Internet listening, too.

Tinderfessions is sort of like the Post Secret of Tinder, minus the artistic, hand-made postcards: Users of the hookup app can submit their deepest, darkest Tinder secrets here, and later see them posted on Tinderfessions’ Twitter feed. You can be relatively sure of your anonymity (as sure as anyone can be in a post-Snowden, post-Heartbleed world, at least); all submissions are moderated, nothing is posted automatically, and full names, Twitter handles, or other personal information won’t ever accompany your confession. By submitting, however, you do give Tinderfessions consent to post it on assorted social media pages as well as its official website — so, if there’s any possibility you’ll want your confession taken down in the future, you might want to steer clear of submitting in the first place.

I’ve never used Tinder — I’m both in a committed relationship and the sort that tends to play it safe, anyway — but I’m weirdly fascinated by its existence. It’s therefore perhaps not surprising that once I started down the proverbial rabbit hole, I found it a little difficult to back myself up out of it. There are people celebrating achieving their goal of having as much sex as possible:

Sex is fun! Good for you, buddy! Just, y’know… make sure you’re being safe about it, yes? Then everybody wins!

There are others who have learned… shall we say, interesting life lessons from Tinder:

Some have — quite impressively, I might add — found true love while riding the hookup wave:

Some have found themselves unwittingly in competition against (gulp!) their parents:

And still others have managed to accomplish this incredible feat:

Hats off to you, sir.

Oh, and let’s not forget this one:

A woman after my own heart.

Of course, there are some things on there that are a little less fun to read; this one, for instance, reminded me why Air France’s recent ad campaign is such a problem:

Often I find myself wondering how on earth this is still an issue. Haven’t we advanced enough as a society to be able to move beyond racism, sexism, homophobia, bigotry, and everything else that falls under that same umbrella? Apparently not, which is rather disheartening. Sigh.

In any event, I’m now going to pry myself away from this bizarrely fascinating Twitter feed; if I don’t, I’ll be here all day. Anyone got anything they want to share?

Image: Tinder