4 Reasons We Don't Want Leonardo DiCaprio to Play Steve Jobs

So, the ongoing saga for the next Steve Jobs biopic has added some new fuel to its fire. With the reported replacement of David Fincher in the Aaron Sorkin-penned script with director Danny Boyle comes talk of a potential new leading man: Leonardo DiCaprio. And as much as we love Leo (and feel it's high time he won an Oscar), we're less than keen on his becoming the man behind the Apple logo.

Now, there are certainly many things that make the idea a promising one — oh what we would give to see DiCaprio tackle one of Sorkin's monologues, or walking-and-talking himself into an expositional frenzy — there are also a few tactical reasons why the casting, if it ends up coming to be, is less than exciting in other regards. And so we're here to declare what's likely to be an unpopular opinion: we don't want Steve Jobs to be played by Leonardo DiCaprio.

He Looks Nothing Like Jobs

This one is pretty inconsequential, but hear us out. No one is saying that Ashton Kutcher's Steve Jobs was all that spot-on or good, but there's no denying the visual similarities between the two even before Kutcher put that beard and turtleneck on. And the film's original dream star, Christian Bale, also has a similar vibe going on that we'd approve of. DiCaprio? His looks fit less organically into the role, and that's a bit too square peg/round hole for us to get down on.

It's So Obviously Award Bait

Listen, there's nothing wrong with doing something for the accolades but it shouldn't feel like such an explicit attempt. Everybody knows that biopics — especially with such names attached to it — are Hollywood's award season bread and butter. Capote, Ray, La Vie En Rose, Pollock, Erin Brockovich, etc: the list goes on and on. We know you're deserving of that Oscar gold that's eluded you so, Leo, but there is such a thing as being too keen and your role choices shouldn't feel so obvious to that.

He Plays This Guy ALL THE TIME

Maybe it's just us, but we're sort of tired of watching DiCaprio play these angry, audacious, old, famous rich people. Jordan Belfort, J. Edgar Hoover, Howard Hughes, Frank Abagnale Jr. — heck you could even throw Jay Gatsby on that pile, fictionality of his existence aside. Aren't you bored yet, Leo?

What He Really Needs is Something Different

Here's a radical thought: what if Leo actually played a guy that wasn't so larger-than-life? Angry lone wolves are his speciality, but that doesn't show a lot of range on the acting front. We'd love to see him really, really challenge himself. Do something subtle, something hard, gritty, and honest in a different, less theatrical way. Now that's something that would really impress us. Oh god imagine Leo in a tiny indie: the unexpectedness of it all makes our hearts go aflutter. What about you?