Guess what today is, everyone? Well, yes, it’s Earth Day; but guess what else it is? That’s right: It’s #NationalSendYourManNudesDay! I was not aware this holiday existed until approximately 45 minutes ago, but hey. You learn a new thing every day, right?
In honor of the occasion, allow us to present to you a humble guide to taking and sending your guy (or your lady, or your unspecified partner of choice) the perfect nude photo — in GIFs, of course, because how else would we adequately be able to explain each step? Before we begin, though, consider this your reminder about the dangers of nudes: Once you send one out into the ether, it’s pretty much there until the end of time. If the idea of your nude photo coming back to bite you in the arse seriously freaks you out, obviously do not take or send any.
If, however, you’re A-OK with it, you may proceed!
1. First, disrobe.
Obviously you cannot take a nude if you are fully clothed.
2. Admire your magnificence.
Nothing is sexier than self-confidence!
3. Do not confuse “nudes” with “noods.”
National Noodle Day isn’t til October, so put that pasta away.
4. Get comfortable.
Comfort is key.
5. Lighting is important.
Natural light is preferable, but be wary of accidentally flashing your neighbor across the street.
Unless, y’know, both you and your neighbor are into that sort of thing.
6. Brush up on your selfie technique.
May we suggest this museum-approved crash course in how to take the perfect selfie?
7. If selfies prove too difficult, enlist a friend for help.
Not this guy, though.
8. Try not to make a face like this:
Or this:
And definitely not like this:
Sorry, JLaw, but no.
You know what? Maybe you should just crop your head out all together.
It’s safer in the long run, don’t you think?
9. Snap the picture.
DO NOT SCREW THIS STEP UP.
10. Attach the photo to a text message.
No, not like that, Alison Hendrix.
11. Select a recipient for the text message.
12. Make sure you did not accidentally select your mom.
13. Hit send.
Congratulations! You have now celebrated National Send Your Man Nudes Day in an appropriate and spirited fashion. Carry on!
Images: HowIMetYourMotherGifs/Tumblr, Meme Guy, Gif Soup, WiffleGif, VintageCameras/Tumblr, Surviving College, OhNoTheyDidn't/LiveJournal, Giphy, Izismile, Gifboom, FanPop, MTV, Moviepilot, I Can Has Cheezburger?, Giphy, Giphy