In what is probably some of the most unsurprising news ever, The 2014 Scripps National Spelling Bee was full of amazingly nerdy and adorable quotes. Because when you put together 12 children/teenagers on a stage with cameras pointed at them and a room full of adults who love spelling, well, you're going to end up with a special edition of Kids (and Nerdy Adults) Say the Darndest Things.
From airing profiles on each of the spellers to asking random people on the street how to spell "misspell" — almost none of them got it right — to the pronouncer, Dr. Jacque Bailly, making funny TV promos, the entire competition was prime for quotable outbursts. And during a competition that is so often filled with a high amount of emotional anxiety, it's nice to focus on the lighter moments of the show. Take a look at some of the best quotes from the night:
From the Championship Spellers:
1. Jacob Williamson: "I'm a member of the Fort Myers' Coin Club, probably the only member under 65 there."
2. Jacob Williamson: As he stepped up to the microphone for the first time he said, "Oh, boy!" (He then proceeded to jump for joy when he spelled his word correctly, which is something he's known for.)
3. Kate Miller: "I will take home with me a suitcase full of happy memories, great friends, and a true feeling of acceptance."
4. Gokul Venkatachalam: "Yeah, I got skill. Lebron, you don't have anything on me."
5. Sriram Hathwar: "A word I know this time, please." (HAH.)
From the official pronouncer, Dr. Jacques Bailly:
6. "Did you bring your "Bee" game?"
From the National Spelling Bee's official Twitter:
No, really — that's a thing now.
And, because they were completely stellar this year...
The best "use of the word in a sentence" examples:
7. "Cora described the beetle as having iridescent chrysochlorous wings, which offended the beetle as, honestly, he wouldn't be caught wearing chrysochlorous anything."
8. "Molly wanted to see the new horror film on opening night, but Bronson thought it looked too detraque to watch at all." (Ugh, molly why would you even suggest something so detraque? God.)
9. "The lighthouse keeper reprimanded the ghost of the salty, old sea captain for messing with the holophote."
10. "It took the scientist three years to develop time travel, and almost as long to find an authentic taglioni to wear back in time."
11 "Unable to find his prescribed collyrium, the cyclops used a squeegee to clean his eye." (That one got a lot of laughs.)
12. "After dropping and shattering a bottle of his most prized vintage, the sommelier began to weep into his tastevin." (Because of course the spellers know what a sommelier is.)
13. "Although hexerei is not as prevalent as it was centuries ago, the sixth graders at Edmonds Middle School are certain that their strange substitute teacher minored in the Dark Arts in college." (That one definitely got a chuckle.)
14. "Freddy warned his parents he might be allergic to opera, so when his sneeze interrupted the brindisi scene in the first act, he whispered, 'I told ya so.'"
15. "The irbis is an extremely secretive animal, especially about his age, weight, and salary." (To which the speller said, "Just like everyone.")
Seriously who even comes up with these sentences? They're amazing and terrifying at the same time.