Unless you live under a rock or R. Kelly has you locked away in a closet or something, by now you’ve most likely heard that, allegedly actress Eva Mendes is pregnant with Ryan Gosling’s genetically perfect spawn. It’s okay, you can cry. Just not too loud, you might wake the baby! (Too soon?) On the bright side, nothing has been officially confirmed as of this very minute, but with no publicists clamoring to defend the actress from such downright ghastly news (in the Internet's opinion, obviously), Eva might as well be shouting “THAT’S RIGHT LADIES! I’M HAVING RYAN GOSLING’S BABY AND THERE’S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT!” from every rooftop in America.
So how did this truly devastating union come to be? We can all thank whoever was the sick, twisted, evil genius in charge of casting The Place Beyond The Pines, the gritty 2011 movie where this unfairly beautiful twosome hit it off. Apparently, they both took their onscreen roles as a boyfriend and girlfriend with a baby on the way very seriously, because the affair quickly carried into real life. They’ve been going strong, and breaking everyone’s hearts, for the past three years now, and with the little Mendes-Gosling bundle of joy that’s going to be arriving soon, it seems as though the world will have to put their “Hey, Girl” fantasies to bed.
If you’ve been able to get through this article without exploding into tears or rocking back and forth in the fetal position, join us as we descend further into a masochistic look at how the Eva Mendes-Ryan Gosling relationship came to be.
Although Mendes and Gosling met briefly before filming, they spent weeks filming The Place Beyond The Pines in Schenectady, N.Y. together. No doubt there were some longing glances shared across a crowded set or two.
In September, they were spotted on their first date. It was at Disneyland, so Gosling was probably all, "Eva, none of these princesses compare to you!" Ugh.
By November, the actors upheld the time-honored tradition of spending Thanksgiving in glamorous Paris, and everyone was forced to finally acknowledge their relationship. Sigh.
Was there a better way for Eva Mendes to ring in the New Year than by meeting Ryan Gosling's mom? She could have broken up with him and spared us all this heart-wrenching pain, but whatever, Eva.
They must have really got on because in June, Twitter and Instagram erupted when Eva was spotted at Gosling's mom's college graduation. Is life ever fair?
Despite breakup rumors swirling around the couple in 2013, they continued to ruin everyone's lives with their love.
Baby-bump watch officially began in February 2014, when Mendes caused quite the stir at LAX when she refused to go through an airport X-ray machine, allegedly telling TSA members she couldn't walk through since she was preggo. She quickly shot down those pesky pregnancy rumors on Ellen, which we all now know to be THE TRUTH. And the truth freakin' hurts!
Last, but not least, the nail in all of our proverbial coffins: reports that Eva Mendes is pregnant with Ryan Gosling's baby. The end is nigh.