It's Time to Let Go, Dustin Diamond

by Maitri Suhas

If you're worried that it's been more than a day since you've heard anything new about the Lifetime movie The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story, fret not. There's a new Saved by the Bell movie trailer that exposes more of the dark side behind the 90s teen dream sitcom in an INTENSE MONTAGE. Among the newly revealed moments: Slater sweats, Zack recklessly pops a wheelie, the producers fret that hormones will destroy the entire show... and Screech? Oh, Screech. This trailer is truly a transparent testament to just how much Dustin Diamond wants to redeem himself with The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell which is based on his book (that his costars have decried as largely lies, lies, lies) and of which he's a producer.

Is Dustin Diamond really a "dick," like Breckin Meyer accuses him of being? In this new trailer we see Screech totally wig out on some other kid when he calls him Screech, and then we see him attacking a punching bag later. It's clear that Diamond's got some inner rage that he was working through on the set of SBTB, and maybe this movie isn't a cash grab after all but a plea for some understanding. You know? After all, Diamond was only 12 when he joined the cast of Saved by the Bell and it must've been tough with all that prepubescent confusion to feel like he was really part of the cast. What a 12-year-old is doing in a boxing gym is beyond me, though. But while all the other kids in the trailer are racin' bikes and partyin' and kissin', it looks like Screech really is oh so lonely.

Speculation aside, I'm praying for you, D. Diamond — perhaps after the premiere of The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story you can find a little peace and solitude in your post-'90s icon life. May this Lifetime movie be your one last swan song. And hey, if nothing comes after, be reassured that your film will inevitably be entered into a rotating lineup with classics like More Sex & the Single Mom. I also wish upon you that it will bring some reconciliation with your former costars, but that doesn't seem likely. Can't win 'em all, right Screech?