It's that time again, guys: The 2014 MTV Video Music Awards are upon us. This Sunday (August 24), a collection of the most awesome people in music will be under one roof and if you're lucky, someone you vote for could win a VMA Moonman.
Of all the awards shows that happen every year, the VMAs is one of the most exciting, when you consider the fact that it's the place to shock your audience. Britney and Madonna's famous kiss? Happened on the VMAs. Miley and Robin Thicke taking the stage in a way that has traumatized many of us to this very day? Happened on the VMAs.
And this year's show shouldn't be any different. After all, Nicki Minaj will be serenading us with "Anaconda," and we all know that's going to be a sight to behold. Taylor Swift is performing my new favorite song, "Shake It Off." And there may or may be a performance that will shed some light on the status of Beyonce's marriage to Jay-Z... information that we may choose to discard if it sends any message other than "we plan to stay together forever and ever and have three more Blue Ivys."
The absolute best part of the VMAs, though? Instead of a panel of music industry voters, we get to decide who goes home with which award. If you haven't voted yet, you're in a bit of a pickle — voting closed in most categories on August 11, but there's still one category open until showtime: Artist To Watch. Who goes home with the prize? It's between some of the most played artists this summer, including 5 Seconds of Summer, Charli XCX, and Sam Smith, so first stop is a study guide:
5 Seconds of Summer
You know, in case you've been waiting for a boy band with lip rings and an edge.
Because it's time for some ladies to take One Direction's X Factor success story throne.
School Boy Q
I'll try to ignore those butts next to his face.
Damn. That song is crazy beautiful.
Now, Vote (If You Can Even Pick Just One Artist)
Just head to MTV's official VMAs page, select the vote tab and pick your favorite. Well, vote if you can manage to pick a single favorite out of that killer lineup. But even after all the back and forth, you still might have to accept voting defeat, because there's pesky little line in the voting rules that states your votes can be revoked if the "Sponsor deems necessary." Rats.
Yeah, so, MTV could totally throw out the votes and rig the entire thing. But I prefer to believe that won't happen. I also choose to believe that all dogs go to heaven, true love is forever, and the guy who gave me the finger in traffic is just having a bad day, so I wouldn't necessarily take my word on that one.