When you were 13, you begged and manipulated your way to the mall, just so that you could hang out in your absolute element. The mall rewarded you with Hot Topic, photo booths, and piping hot Wetzel’s Pretzels. It also introduced you to some of the finer things in the 2000s life, like heavy eyeliner, f.y.e. music, and rebellion.
When you weren’t at the mall, you were text messaging your friends, constantly doing the math to stay under the text message limit so your dad wouldn’t yell at you, and using T9 so that you could engage in like five conversations efficiently. Either that, or you were IMing the love of your life, and boasting like the junior criminal you were after illegally downloading the new Green Day song.
The 2000s were a magical time that encouraged sk8er fashion, attitude, and a solid Internet profile. It became clear that we were entering the digital age of no return, because let’s be honest — you spent more time on your phone, Myspace, and AIM than you did talking to humans in real life. But it was totally chill, because the 2000s also gifted us with these gems, which you were completely obsessed with a decade ago (but have likely all but forgotten about my now.)
1. Your pink Razr flip phone
Razr was the coolest phone you could own. It was super thin, had a front camera
for optimal selfies before selfies were a thing, and you could customize the
wallpaper with Che Guevera or skeleton Hello Kitty.
2. ~*~Body glitter~*~
was essential if you were going to a birthday party or a school dance. Coating
your arms, cheeks, and neck until you were flammable was the look everyone went
3. Your AIM screenname (s/n for those in the know)
4. Your AIM away message
Srsly I don’t get ppl sometimez. -_-
I’ll lay me down tonight
Much further down
Watch stars go out tonight
On sinking ground
brb watching Nightmare Before Christmas ^_^
Your gateway to indie heaven started here. It often times came with viruses.
6. Making your hair “crunchy”
else bought economy sized Aussie Sprunch spray to intensify curls? Your hair
felt like a pine tree, but it sure looked fiiine.
7. Those jeans without pockets on the butt
So fly, so bootylicious.
8. Juicy Tubes
these actually be called This Is Tinted Glue You Smeared On Your Lips? Because
try walking around in slightly windy weather and not have a hundred strands of
hair pulled out by your glossy lips.
9. “Survivor” by Destiny’s Child
had it this song totally threw shade at LeToya Luckett and LaTavia Roberson,
two former Destiny’s Child members. Oooooh drama.
10. Baby G watches
clunky, pastel bad boys gave preps the ability to tell time in style.
forget “What’s Luv.”
12. Hot pink skater shoes
anything was all the rage. Thank you, Avril Lavigne. May you burn for eternity for what you embodied. But goddamn, we loved it so much back then. Bonus points if
your skater shoes looked like they were about to fall off. Pretty much, the closer you could get to your shoes falling off without them actually falling off, the cooler you were.
13. Jessica Simpson’s edible perfume
didn’t want to smell and taste like a sugar cookie? Jessica Simpson knew what
10th grade, Amelie became not only your favorite film, but your essence. After watching it, you dipped
your hand in barrels of beans when you were at Whole Foods with your mom. And you
were convinced that you would only find true love in France after a series of
incredibly quirky events.
15. Your scene boyfriend
there was hipster and shortly after emo, there was scene. Scene meant that you
had a fashion mullet, that you solely wore highlighter MAC eyeshadow, and that your
attire of choice was a black Atreyu hoodie.
16. Myspace Surveys
What was better than an inquisitive Myspace Survey at the end of a really long day? You would spend hours unwinding after school, answering questions like, “What was the last piece of paper you touched?” or “Do u believe in life after love?”
17. Dashboard Confessional
I'm not even going to include a video because none of us is ready for that many throwback feels right now.
18. Angsty Kelly Osbourne
this was Kelly in her prime. Like, I get that she’s a total fashionista now,
but you have to admit that her hot pink hair and ironic school girl outfits
epitomized her identity as Ozzy’s perma-pissed daughter.
19. Your LJ
Current mood: annoyed :(
Current music: // rain \\
20. The Garden State Soundtrack
listened to this CD on repeat during your twee phase, when you liked to describe
yourself as “totally random” and definitely wrote "caring is creepy" all over your binder in Sharpie. You went a full year only wearing long hippy skirts with platform flip-flips.
21. The cute lead singer from Simple Plan
Pierre Bouvier was your boyfriend, and every year at Warped Tour you planned on confessing your undying love for him.
22. The original iPod Classic
At first you were skeptical because how could a tiny white rectangle encompass your entire CD collection? You eventually could not go anywhere without it and faced multiple detentions when your geometry teacher caught you with your white headphones in.
23. When you watched and read The Virgin Suicides
learned to describe it as “transcendently haunting,” but you secretly still
didn’t really get it.
24. Your crush on Donnie in Donnie Darko
exactly does one suck a fuck?” was the most badass thing you ever heard a guy
25. Knowing the words to “Lady Marmalade” and feeling naughty
How a song about prostitution became huge with a bunch of tweens, I have no idea. But that’s kind of how the 2000s rolled.