In case the word didn't make it clear enough for you, Thanksgiving means it's time to sit and reflect about what we’re truly thankful for. The health and happiness of our loved ones always seems to be a popular one (if you're into that kind of thing). I kid, I kid: Yes, this a time for family and friends, and for appreciating just how lucky we are. The rumors are true.
But sometimes, the fact remains that what we say we’re thankful for and what we’re actually thankful for don’t exactly line up. This doesn’t mean you’re a bad person, but rather someone who’s decent enough to somewhat keep the truth to yourself. Whether the truth is steeped in a brutal honesty that can be a bit painful or a little embarrassing, it’s sometimes best to keep the whole truth to yourself and choose a bunch of platitudes instead to gloss over the reality. It’s called playing nice.
This year, as you sit down at the Thanksgiving table, here are some of things you might find yourself saying, and here’s what you just might mean instead. Remember, this doesn’t make you bad; it just makes you smart enough to protect your loved ones from what really goes on in your head.
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL I get TO SPEND TIME WITH MY FAMILY
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL I DON’T HAVE TO GO TO WORK FOR FOUR DAYS STRAIGHT
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL FOR having A LOVING AND SUPPORTIVE PARTNER
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL FOR NIGHTLY ORGASMS THAT BLOW MY MIND
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL FOR BEING SINGLE
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL I’M GOING TO HOOK UP WITH MY high school CRUSH AFTER DINNER
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL FOR THIS AMAZING MEAL
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL THIS MEAL WILL GIVE ME AN EXCUSE TO BE A WASTE OF SPACE ON THE COUCH FOR HOURS
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL THAT I’M GAINFULLY EMPLOYED
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL MY BOSS HASN’T NOTICED I’VE BEEN STEALING OFFICE SUPPLIES
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL THAT ALMOST ALL OF MY RELATIVES MADE IT TO THANKSGIVING DINNER
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL THAT MY COUSIN's FLight WAS CANCELLED BECAUSE SHE’S the worst
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL THAT I NO LONGER HAVE TO SIT AT THE KID’S TABLE
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: THANKS SO MUCH FOR FINALLY NOTICING I’M AN ADULT ALTHOUGH I’VE BEEN ONE FOR A DECADE NOW
WHAT YOU SAY: I’M THANKFUL FOR THE PUMPKIN PIE THAT MOM MADE FOR DESSERT
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I’M THANKFUL FOR THE FACT THAT I ALREADY ATE HALF OF IT THIS MORNING
WHAT YOU SAY: I'M THANKFUL FOR FRIENDS WHO ALWAYS HAVE MY BACK
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I'M THANKFUL FOR FRIENDS WHO PUT UP WITH MY ENDLESS ARRAY OF DRAMA
WHAT YOU SAY: I'M THANKFUL FOR PARENTS WHO ARE ALWAYS THERE FOR ME
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: I'M THANKFUL MOM HASN'T REMINDED ME about my biological clock tonight
WHAT YOU SAY: I'M THANKFUL I WAS ONLY STUCK IN TRAFFIC FOR TWO HOURS
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: IF I'd STAYED HOME I WOULDn't HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THE FIVE hOURs of TRAFFIC I'LL BE STUCK IN ON THE WAY BACK
WHAT YOU SAY: I'M GRATEFUL TO HAVE YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: can you help me move sunday?
WHAT YOU SAY: I'M GRATEFUL i have SUCH A WONDERFUL FAMILY
WHAT YOU ACTUALLY MEAN: THERE'S NO CRAZY QUITE LIKE MY FAMILY'S BRAND OF CRAZY — AND THAT'S THE WAY I LIKE IT