Behold a 30-Pound Cat Falling in Slow Motion

Well, folks, it's taken however long the Internet has existed, but we finally found him: the King of the Cats. Or at least, I'm assuming that is the role that this monstrously large cat serves to society, otherwise I cannot fathom a reason why any cat actually reached this weight. Furthermore, I can't understand what exactly possessed this man to film his 30 pound cat falling in slow motion to see if he lands on his feet, but alas, this is apparently where we're at today as a society.

Watching this cat fall in slow motion will give you adequate time to think about how much you two have in common, when you think about it. This video will likely make you feel like a lazy human being in your core. Hey, don't look at me, you're the one who clicked on a video about a cat falling in slow motion. This fat cat falling and falling and faaaaaallllingggggg will become a metaphor for every part of your life you wish you could fast-forward through, including the agonizing two minutes after you've hit the snooze button for the umpteenth time and you are still in denial about waking up, the slowest crawl of traffic you have ever endured, and every other wasted moment of your precious time that you could have used being productive. The novel you'll never write! The rare species of iguana you will never save! STARE INTO THIS VIDEO OF A CAT FALLING AND FEEL THE UTTER TRUTH OF YOUR MORTALITY IN WAYS THAT YOU NEVER HAVE BEFORE.

Or, you know, just watch a video of a cat falling. His name is Fenway, by the way. And yes, there is protective padding on the floor, so no harm can come to him regardless of the outcome. I'd tell you if he manages to stick it, but that would be like making you watch the DVR'd gymnastics part of the Olympics, which is like half the fun that it would be experiencing it live. Enjoy the magic that will tailspin you into questioning your purpose on this earth:

Image: YouTube