The Snuggie Up Collection Is a Thousand Times Worse Than the Original Snuggie (Yes, It's Possible)

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Let's talk about Snuggies. Not the plain old blue ones you're so used to seeing — no, the new Snuggie. It's called the Snuggie Up and it comes in a variety of horrifying designs that look like something you'd find on clearance at Party City the week after Halloween.

The Snuggie Up is a redesign that has been released in time to celebrate the brand's five-year anniversary. It features fitted sleeves and a waist tie to make it more functional and comes in blue and pink as well as variety of other very bizarre prints like the "Female Evening Gown" and "Male Tuxedo" (glad to see they are promoting gender norms and hideous loungewear at the exact same time). Each Snuggie Up will run you $14.99, which is 14 more dollars than I'd be willing to spend on something that looks like a less-trendy version of a monk's robe.

I've never understood the appeal of the blanket-with-arms thing — wouldn't a regular old blanket or bathrobe suffice? — so I'm definitely not all about this new version, especially not the ones with fake abs drawn on the front. Yes, you heard me — FAKE. ABS. Behold the glory:

How is this even a real product???? Will people buy this? I really, really hope not because it's not nearly as cute and clever as the people behind the scenes at Snuggie seem to think it is. Why not skip the tacky gag gift this holiday season and get someone you love a stylish throw blanket or something?

Images: Snuggie