We all have that crowning moment of ultimate satisfaction we look forward to every day. Mine is and always will be peeing. Can we just stop for a moment and appreciate how wonderful peeing is? I drink enough tea that I get to experience the magic approximately seventy times a day. Unfortunately my enthusiasm for emptying my bladder was not captured in this Buzzfeed video about satisfying things girls love, but plenty of other things I heartily enjoy were.
I'm warning you right now that if you happen to be wearing a bra while you're watching this, you won't be for very long. I am personally so good at ridding myself of the boob prison that I'm pretty sure if I closed my eyes and clicked a pair of magic heels three times, it would just unsnap the thing and leave me exactly where I was. There's no place like bralessness.
A lot of the moments in this video will resonate pretty widely among girls, but I have to say, as far as Buzzfeed videos go, I found a lot of this surprisingly not relatable. Maybe I'm an outlier in that I don't have miniature orgasms "hydrating my hands," but maybe not (I have some suspicions that the things I am satisfied by tend to be more gross in nature). Here are some of the moments that girls all find satisfying. You can be the judge as to whether or not it applies to you:
1. Taking off your bra
I can't emphasize enough how much I agree with this. My bra could fly off my rack, out the window and into oncoming traffic right now and it still wouldn't depict just how much satisfaction I get from flinging it off my human form. Thunder and Lightning need to BREATHE, y'all. (Yes, I've named my boobs, and I'm concerned for those of you who haven't. How do you let them know they're loved?)
2. Walking in loud shoes
This was one of the ones that earned itself an eyebrow raise from me. Why would I derive satisfaction from basically walking around in hooves? Maybe it's just because I'm not a heels person. Some ladies can rock a pair of power heels that click-clack through a room, but I'm more of a Hello Kitty sneaker squeaker myself. Regardless, I've never been like, "YEAH, NOISY SHOES! GET IT!"
3. Discovering you're not really on your period
I appreciate how real this one was, toilet seat relief and all. There is nothing more ominous than a telltale sploosh down there that sends you rushing to the nearest public restroom like the back of your pants are on fire, and finding out you have dodged a menstrual bullet is one of the most glorious moments of your existence. It takes every ounce of my willpower not to bound out of the ladies' room Disney princess-style and start singing about my not-bleeding uterine walls.
4. Realizing you haven't smudged a mug with your lipstick
What even is going on here? When has that ever happened? Maybe I am dangerously behind on some ultra mega futuristic non-mug-smudging lipstick trend, but last I checked, I have never in my whole life ever put my puckered up lip on a mug without smudging it to high hell. This is a lie, Buzzfeed. A SMUDGED UP, DIRTY MUG LIE.
And even if it weren't, would I ever actually be this excited about it? Probs not. Caffeine > Lipstick.
5. Taking off your make-up at the end of the day
Bedtime is my face's favorite time of day. Watching this basically just made me want to dunk my face into a sink. I don't necessarily love putting on make-up, but I am OBSESSED with the feeling of taking it off.
6. Putting moisturizer on your hands
I dunno, guys. I just don't get excited about moisturizer. It's like a means to an end to me. Yeah, it smells nice, but at the end of the day I don't really care that much about it as long as it's doing the job. That being said, I have friends who are RELIGIOUS moisturizers, some of whom are Lush store employees and have some expert level knowledge on the subject. Guess it just sort of depends on what kind of moisturizer you like to randomly sniff during the day.
Here's the link to the rest of the video, so you can see where your every day satisfactions rank on the list:
Images: YouTube (8)