Mitt Romney & Evander Holyfield Will Face Off In A Charity Boxing Match & Our Money's On The Rominator
He may not be a former Undisputed World Champion boxer, but anyone who saw him on the campaign trail in 2012 knows that Mitt Romney is no shrinking violet. Some might even say he's quite intimidating. So don't expect a quick, one-sided bout when Mitt Romney takes on Evander Holyfield in a boxing charity event in May. No, I'm not joking. Romney is fighting former heavyweight champ Evander Holyfield in the boxing ring, and my money is on Romney. You might be snickering now, but if the man can survive two presidential campaigns, then he'll put up a good fight.
On May 15, Romney vs. Holyfield will be the marquee event during a multi-bout fundraising boxing match at the Rail Event Center in Salt Lake City. The even will raise money for Charity Vision, an organization that provides medical services to developing countries. As guests dine on hors d'oeuvres in their formal attire at the black-tie event, Romney and Holyfield will prepare to go head to head in what might be the most surprising fight of the century. When Romney was asked about his chances, he gave the Salt Lake Tribune a very modest answer:
It will either be a very short fight, or I will be knocked unconscious. It won't be much of a fight. We'll both suit up and get in the ring and spar around a little bit.
This is obviously part of his strategy. He wants Holyfield to underestimate him, he wants the whole world to underestimate him, and then BAM! Out comes the Rominator.
The former Massachusetts governor also told the paper, "There will be bouts between real, active professional prize fighters." I think he should count himself among them. If his political sparring is any indication, then he might knock Holyfield out in the first round. Take a look at Romney's undisputed tough side.
The Gloves Come Off When He Takes On Political Opponents
Sure, Holyfield has beaten the likes of Mike Tyson and George Foreman, but Romney got Rick Perry to shut up.
Did you see that face he throws at Obama? If Romney threw that in the ring, Holyfield will definitely be thrown off balance. I hope Romney's coach is reading this. And if focus is key in a boxing match, then it's hard to beat the training Romney's had in preparation for his presidential debates.
Romney Has A Short Fuse
Romney has been known to go into Hulk mode at times, and he'll definitely want to unleash his anger in the ring. Because there's nothing scarier than an angry conservative coming at you head on.
Perhaps the cool, calm dorky dad type with the perfectly coiffed gray hair is a facade. Maybe this Romney, who's brimming with anger and dying to work out his aggression on some free weights with Paul Ryan, is the authentic Romney. In 2012, after his presidential debate with Obama, Obama's campaign manager, Jim Messina, told reporters:
Romney seemed angry, sweaty, he was rattled. It was the real Romney.
Romney's Training Playlist
In the next two months, we're hoping Romney works on his form, jabs, combos, footwork, you name it. He might not be used to all this physical training, and at 68, he's probably a little rusty, but we're in his corner. That's why we've come up with a suggested playlist to get him pumped for the big fight. Don't let us down, Mittens.
"Fighter" — Christina Aguilera "Lose Yourself" — Eminem"Mama Said Knock You Out" — LL Cool J"Hit 'Em Up" — 2Pac"Welcome to the Jungle" — Guns N' Roses"Jump Around" — House of Pain "We Will Rock You" — Queen"Survivor" — Beyoncé"Iron Man" — Black Sabbath"Rock You Like a Hurricane" — Scorpions"Eye of the Tiger" — Survivor (duh)But we hope that his entrance song, the one he'll walk out to as he stares down Evander Holyfield, will be Katy Perry's "Roar."
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