How To Make A Grownup-Friendly Easter Basket

Whoever decided that Easter baskets were only for kids was boring and unimaginative. Seriously, why doesn't that big, over-sized bunny leave Easter baskets for adults? Truly, can you not think of about 10 things you'd love to find magically stuffed into a basket in the corner of your living room on Sunday morning? A part of me feels the same about trick-or-treating but then, adult costumes melded with showing up at peoples' homes at all hours of the night... probably not the best of ideas.

Easter, though, is a holiday meant for everyone to celebrate, and there's no reason we as adults shouldn't partake of the colors, chocolate, and egg hunting festivities. It only follows then that we should all be privy to the best ingredients for a grownup Easter basket of sorts; a little slice of hedonism in a world with too many student loans. I don't know about you, but I don't think people take enough opportunity to have a good time; to treat themselves. So whether you craft this basket with yourself or a friend in mind, know that you are 100 percent supported. Feel free to go wild — these ideas are just starting-off points in a realm of both delicious and entertaining possibilities. The Easter Bunny himself will be impressed.

Step 1: The Basket

Preferably you want one covered with puppies! But if (like me) that's not an option in your sad world, head out to CVS or whatever pharmaceutical monopoly has invaded your immediate region, and pick a basket of your liking. Generally, pink and plastic means you're going semi-adult, and woven wood means you're going full-adult. I'll leave this decision up to you based on your level of commitment to adulthood as a whole. No judgment, as this is the most complicated relationship I currently have in life.

Step 2: The Alcohol

You know what's truly great about baskets? Everything from a wine to a whiskey bottle will fit; they're one-size-accommodates-all. They don't discriminate. They won't judge. You'll be like the Easter Bunny's boozy cousin, providing blurry edges to all you touch.

Step 3: The Entertainment

If you've been looking for an excuse to pick up that Keeping Up With The Kardashians box set, this is it. Consider it an investment in new baby Reign's future, because he's named Reign, and he'll be needing a lot of support.

Step 4: The Adornments

Ribbons, bows, lace! This is your chance to get creative. Then tell yourself you'll repurpose the lace for some adorable Pinterest project that will either never happen in actuality, or will turn out looking like a three-year-old did it. You'll start to wonder what kind of craft ninjas actually exist in this world, and also how you failed to get the gene for that when grandma was so good with embroidery. Then you'll drink more wine. Thumbs up for extreme honesty.

Step 5: The Fuzzy Handcu... Oh Wait, I Mean, The Fuzzy Chicks

This (probably stuffed, probably animal, maybe just fluffy) component must fulfill one of the following requirements:

A. It makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Oh wait, also the wine.

B. It makes you feel like you absolutely must cuddle something (ANYTHING) right then, or you'll die. Just kidding... You won't die. But you are, like, really squeamish for a good half an hour, and it's moderately uncomfortable.

Voila! You have your grownup Easter basket! Cheering! Applause! Cats! Chipotle!

Images: Jake Bellucci/Flickr; Giphy (6)