6 Reasons To Have Sex With An Artist (or Artistic Type) — As If You Needed Convincing To Begin With
In my early twenties, my mother begged me not to go out with any more musicians, actors, painters, poets, or just about anyone who considered themselves "an artist." If she was trying to save me from getting laid a lot then she probably knew what she was doing, because art students have more sex than any other major (except sociology), according to a recent survey by British student newspaper The Tab. Thankfully, I didn't listen to her pleas to instead knock boots with physics or computer science students (which, incidentally, are the majors most likely to be virgins, says the same study) because, deep down, I wanted to do it with someone in a similar field that's high maintenance and emotionally unstable — just like me!
But really. Take it from someone who has mostly banged creative types throughout her entire life. Every attempt to find partners in other career fields has been a disaster for me, sexually. Let me be clear, I'm not necessarily advocating dating an artist — that is a whole different challenge, which can be far less pleasurable. And I realize that stereotypes don't always turn out to be true, so I'm not dissing your choice of sexual partners if they're outside the artist spectrum. I know some guys in finance who...eew, sorry I just can't even finish this sentence. All that aside, there are so many fulfilling reasons to have sex with an artist. Here are six ways it can't be beat:
1. Their pick up game is probably on point
Artists are used to conjuring great meaning out of nothing, and this skill translates nicely to the pick up game. As anyone who has been sweet talked by an artist knows, they are usually quite practiced in, um, clever circumlocution, or as the French say, bullshitting. It's part of their job to know how to say just what you want to hear to get to your gallery opening (if you catch my drift).
2. Your pre-sex experience can be just as stimulating as the sex itself
If you start your evening at the theatre, a concert, a reading, or a fashion show, you'll probably be well-lubricated before you hit the sheets. Art is a great aphrodisiac (assuming, of course, you dig the art in question), and if the art is even the slightest bit sensual, erotic, or straight up sexual, you're already well into the foreplay segment before skin-to-skin contact begins.
3. They probably have a more aesthetically pleasing pad to do it in
Chances are, your artist will bring their work or aesthetic proclivities to his/her living space, which means a lot more to look at while you're having sex. Even if they're broke, at the very least you'll likely still get a vibrantly painted wall or maybe a framed record/poster of some interesting endeavor they've been a part of. At best, you're going to be walking into a funhouse of visual pleasure, so sex can feel like it's happening in another dimension — or at least in a slightly more interesting one.
4. Your copulating might inspire a piece of art
Maybe the sex will be so good that you'll become stuck in your artist's creative craw, and the only way to release the experience of your ecstasy will be to write a song, draw a sketch, or write a poem about you. While you may never know a particular piece of art was created as a result of your good time, it's still satisfying to think you might be fodder for something that lasts beyond those few hours in bed.
5. You might receive said piece of art as a gift
What's better than inspiring art? Getting to have that art sent to your inbox, or your doorstep, or performed live for you when you're least expecting it. Of course we assume you'll like said piece of art, but even if its horrible, it's the thought that counts, right?
6. They probably view sex as an art, too
Those with artistic sensibilities tend to view the world as a bastion of beauty, and each moment and action in life ripe with aesthetic possibilities. Because of this, many artists also view sex as an art unto itself, and have spent far more time setting a mood and practicing their moves than those who aren't in creative fields. (Just think of transferring those delicate brushstrokes or vibrating vocal ululations to the canvas of the human body…) Of course, there are artists who care so much about their art that they're not interested as much in your art, I mean, orgasm, so that isn't good, either. But on the whole, the stereotype of the artist as sex artist holds true often enough that this is the key reason they've got sex on lock.
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