Hillary Clinton Loves Burrito Bowls Just Like You

by Jenny Hollander

What a time to be alive. On Monday, two of your all-time favorite things came together in a glorious union that could only be compared to, I don't know, Ruth Bader Ginsburg drifting into a wine coma at the State of the Union, or Meryl Streep saying that her favorite emoji was the poop icon. (One of those things actually happened, I promise. But just one.) Hillary Clinton visited Chipotle en route to Iowa, where she'll officially kick off her campaign to move back to the White House in 2016.

This story only gets better and better. Clinton is actually taking a good ol'-fashioned road trip to Iowa, in a van a Clinton aide told the AP was named Scooby. Let's take a moment to look at the big picture here: Hillary Clinton, in a van named Scooby, stopping off at Chipotle en route to Iowa. Clinton is young, wild, and free. Clinton is you, if you happened to have a van named Scooby and were going to Iowa for some reason.

So, the biggest question of all: What did she order? According to a tweet from Ohio news station WTVG, Clinton ordered a chicken bowl with guacamole. Upon careful inspection, she certainly looks as though she's eating a chicken bowl.

Last summer, Obama, too, went to a local D.C. Chipotle and leaned way too far over the sneeze guard. Look, Obama's the president and he does what he wants, but when in Chipotle, you play by Chipotle's rules. Obama did not, and he paid for it with a barrage of criticism. Obama did not go back to Chipotle. (Or, if he did, he certainly didn't let anyone photograph him there. I'm imagining him sneaking in at the dead of night: "Burrito bowl, please, extra guac. You never saw me.")

What's next? Hillary campaigning for a taco emoji? (Yes, please, Hillary. Please.)