The 4 Worst Things About Watching Your Boyfriend Grow Out His Beard, Because Patchy Can Be Painful
If you’re like me, you love men with beards. But, what happens when they shave? Whether it’s for Movember, in preparation for the hot, humid summer, or if they just want a change, our beardless boyfriend’s new look is an adjustment and takes getting used to. Of course, then there’s different beard styles, based on what your guy prefers. Beards are so popular, in fact, that some razor and razor blade companies are losing money. And, the trend is making a comeback globally, as well, new barber shops opening up to accommodate the increased number of men with facial hair, like in Warsaw, Poland. Piotr Zuchowski, manager of the Barberian Academy & Barber Shop there, said barbers are returning after having disappeared during Communism.
“To grow a beard is to start a new life and to have more confidence in yourself,” said Salvador Chanza, a master barber from Spain, in a Global News article. “You look a little older, so people have more respect.” Chanza trains others to be barbers, too.
But, all this is a moot point when your boyfriend grabs his electric razor and decides to shave it all off. According to my research—i.e., having dated a few guys with beards who all shaved them off at some point—these are the worst things about watching a boyfriend grow out his beard.
1. Looks can be deceiving.
When an old boyfriend of mine shaved as part of his Halloween costume (we were going as Annie Hall and Alvy Singer), I did double-takes every day and felt I was dating someone else. I had liked how much older and wiser he looked with the beard and missed it. Getting used to his new appearance was tough, but then I reminded myself that he was the same, sweet guy, personality-wise.
2. The “between beards” look gives him 101 new looks.
This can get confusing—who are you dating? (Imagine if we women changed our hairstyle every day, or more often than we currently do.) Between no beard and full beard, your boyfriend morphs into several different guys and versions of himself with every phase of beard growth, from no facial hair, then stubble, to a light beard, and, eventually, a thick one (plus, every stage of beard growth between).
3. It hurts.
Yes, love hurts. So does making out with a between-beards guy. Gone are the days where his soft beard rubbed up against your face when you two got close. Now, if you even dare make out with him, be prepared for your chin to get scratched up and pink from the scruff. Your boyfriend could try to use beard lotions to soften the makeout blows, but proceed with caution in any case. (TMI: At one point, a bit before Christmas when my then-boyfriend’s almost-beard was patchy and painful, we found a Santa beard and sometimes affixed that to his face, pre-makeout. It sounds crazy, I know, but my chin appreciated it. The substitute beard we got was not as extreme as the ones here, but you get the idea.)
4. It requires patience. Lots.
Waiting is never easy, no matter if it’s waiting for a guy to text us, an acceptance letter to grad school, or seeing if we got that job after a killer interview. I thought those were bad, but waiting for a guy’s beard to grow back is the worst. My Alvy Singer impersonator said it would “just take a month” to grow back. But, to get back to the same, soft beard depth that he had before, it was closer to two long, torturous ones. (Note: This varies guy-to-guy.)
Once you survive all of the above, though, congratulations! You have your beloved bearded boyfriend back!