Baby steps. The full list of Maxim's 2015 Hot 100 was released on Wednesday and, as expected, every woman on the list is stupidly hot. I didn't break out a calculator to provide the following stat, so please don't quote me, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say: 97 percent of the ladies are between the ages of 18 and 30 and if there's a BMI here higher than 22 percent, I'll eat my weight in chocolate cake. Right now.
It's OK. I've come to regard Maxim's Hot 100 the way I did the superlatives in my high school yearbook. Kate Upton: roll my eyes. Katy Perry: yep, sounds right. Megan Fox: wake me when this is over. Model Miranda Kerr made the list this year and the only appropriate reaction is: well duh. She's a professional hottie — Maxim would be insincere not to include her on the list.
But, this year, you may notice the magazine did things a bit differently. Instead of lumping all the hot women into one general box of Holy Hotness, they divided hot into five distinctive categories. You've got the Number One hottest woman of all — Taylor Swift — followed by the hottest models, actresses, singers, and "The Ones to Watch," which I'm ashamed to admit I first assumed was a creepy excuse to lust over teens like Chloë Grace Moretz. I had to eat my words when I noticed the following celeb listed in that category:
Also: Downton Abbey's Lily James. Game of Thrones' Nathalie Emmanuel. Three-time U.S. Champion figure skater Ashley Wagner.
Swoon. Sure, like Swift, all of these women are physically perfect by societal standards, but they're also accomplished, independent, well-spoken, and graceful. Click on the other categories and you might find yourself wondering whether you should get a subscription to Maxim.
Finally, someone is noticing that Orphan Black's Tatiana Maslany is a goddess. Monica Bellucci, at 50, made the list, as did Zoe Kravitz, Angelina Jolie, Alexis Bledel, Elizabeth Olsen, singer Kelela, FKA Twigs, and 41-year-old Victoria Beckham. As far as models go? Upton is out this year. Badass model and actress Cara Delevingne is in. Since Maxim's new Editor-in-Chief, Kate Lanphear, took control of the publication, being uber hot isn't enough to make the Hot List. Women also have to contribute something to society or, at the very least, be interesting. Here's Lanphear, sharing her thoughts on CBS This Morning about how "subtle is the new sexy:"
I love that the women aren't ranked, other than Swift, and that a singer who spends 18 hours a day working on her songwriting skills isn't lumped into the same category as a model who gets that same time to work on her appearance.
At the end of the day, I know the majority of these women share the same dress size. But I'm happy Maxim is taking a small step forward and doing its part to redefine beauty. Image: Getty Images