Tony The Healer Quotes From ‘The Bachelorette’ Are Reason Enough For Kaitlyn To Send Him Packing
Regardless of the number of times Kaitlyn Bristowe tries to emphasize how great the crop of guys are this season on The Bachelorette, I'm opting to disagree. Some of the guys are definitely awesome, but a few of them? Totally questionable. One of the men who confuses me most is Tony, a guy from St. Louis who calls himself a healer (meaning that he is actually a massage therapist). In just three short episodes, he's managed to single himself out as The Guy Who Talks To Inanimate Objects, and in last week's installment, he totally lost it and started demanding "the truth" from everyone around him. Tony might claim to be zen, but I have a feeling that's not the case. In fact, the gems of knowledge he's dropped so far actually make Tony one of the weirdest Bachelorette contestants ever.
Being that it's totally possible that Tony is this season's Ashley S., I'm hoping he sticks around if for no other reason than I'm curious about what he'll say and do next. If you're looking for a roundup of Tony The Healer's weirdest quotes so far, you've come to the right place, because nobody wants to relive the madness like I do.
"I've been waiting for this moment for awhile. I believe in love. Real love. And I hope the universe provides."
Because Tony was the only guy who dared use the same pickup line on both Kaitlyn and Britt during limo arrivals.
"The further I drift away in my mind, the closer I seem to get where I want to be."
OK, Tony. OK.
"Hi, babies. How are you tonight? Love you."
This isn't a weird quote on its own. It's weird when he's saying it to his plants.
"I'm not here for her. I'm here for us. My heart means just as much to me as her love does to me."
Here, Tony's talking about his quest for love with Kaitlyn, and he's making absolutely no sense.
"I will open myself up fully to Kaitlyn, but still pay attention to the signs the universe presents."
Like the ones that tell him to talk to his plants, maybe.
"What we could create together is beyond our imagination."
Poor Kaitlyn, who had no idea what to do when Tony said this to her. It's not her fault that she has to deal with these guys — and unfortunately, I have a feeling that this particular conversation may have put him on the chopping block for the next rose ceremony. Sorry, Tony!
Images: Rick Rowell, Matt Petit/ABC (3), Screengrab/ABC