Life

These Marsupials Are Banging Each Other To Death

Bragging that you can go all night? You've got nothing on the Tasman Peninsula Dusky Antechinus, a species of the small, mouse-like marsupial that was just recently discovered. Found in Australia and New Guinea, Andrew Baker of the Queensland University of Technology released a statement about this new species and its... unusual mating habits. Basically their males have sex for up to 14 hours at a time— but it's nowhere near as fun as it sounds. There is as two to three week mating period and during this period the males go a little nuts. Dusky Antechinus males have sex with as many females as possible eventually leading to their deaths. Baker told the Australian Broadcasting Company:

"They'll bleed internally, they have ulcers, their fur falls off in patches, sometimes they're stumbling around blind and still trying to mate... Ultimately, the testosterone triggers a malfunction in the stress hormone shut-off switch; the resulting rise in stress hormones causes the males' immune systems to collapse and they all drop dead before the females give birth to a single baby."

Yikes. The species is already in danger due to climate change, but as The Washington Post notes "their proclivity for ferocious, suicidal sex frenzies aren't helping them any." Each mating season halves the antechinus population.

Fourteen hours sounds like a record to me, but there's a lot of strange stuff happening in the animal kingdom. Here are some other animal sex habits. (I hope you enjoy this list, because I Googled "weird animal sex" enough times that I've certainly ended up on some kind of list).

1. Emperor Penguins

They only do it once a year. Once a year. And It's only for a couple of minutes. Face down in the snow. I thought they were supposed to be the cute romantic animal?

2. Lions

Lions are all about quantity over quality, it would seem. According to Lion Alert "A lioness mates up to 100 times per day with an average interval of 17 minutes (range 4 – 148), each mating lasting for c. 21 seconds (range 8 – 68)". Ow. Owowowowow.

3. Ducks

Some ducks can ejaculate in just 12 seconds. That's nothing, right? But bare in mind their penises can be up to 20 cm long, so I guess 12 seconds is all they need.

4. Pandas

Panda sex normally only lasts about a minute and a half. But one very special panda, Lu Lu, has been setting records all over the shop with reported romps of nearly eight minutes and another of 18 minutes. Lu Lu is your new panda sex hero. I have no idea who your old panda sex hero was.

5. Dolphins

We think as dolphins as a hyper sexual animal, but sorry lady dolphins, your fellas are only lasting about 12 seconds.

6. Bonobos

It's hard to tell exactly what to nail down as bonobo sex, because so much of what they do is sexual. Casual gropes as hellos, lots of homo- and bi-sexual encounters, they're pretty much always doing something sexy.

7. Humans

Sex time varies from person to person, and I've found that a lot of guys are concerned about finishing too quickly. But "a study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine found 'a median IELT of 5.4 minutes'", so don't feel like every guy is going all night long. There's always time for round two!

Images: Gary Cranitch, Queensland Museum, Giphy (7)