There’s no going around it: The United States needs a female president. And it wouldn’t hurt to have Kim Kardashian in the White House. Now before you throw your laptop out the window, hear me out. We have two women — Hillary Clinton and Carly Fiorina — in the running for the 2016 presidential election, and Kardashian has about the same chances of winning as the former CEO of Hewlett-Packard. But a while ago, The Hill revealed a shocking revelation: Kardashian has an outside shot of becoming the next president of the United States. The chances are still low — at less than 1 percent — but that means if you made a $100 bet on a Kardashian White House, you’d win $100,000 in return.
Kardashian has made some headlines in the politicosphere in the past. In fact, she showed promising talent for a presidential campaign by calling out politicians for skirting around certain issues. Need proof? Well, on April 24, the celebrity penned an op-ed for TIME on the 100th anniversary of the Armenian Genocide and said she was disappointed (!!!) in President Obama’s reluctance in using the term “genocide” (he called it a “mass atrocity,” yikes!). So we know she’s interested in American politics, but where does Kardashian stand on the issues?
A Kardashian Presidency Would Be The Most Transparent Administration Ever
While Pulitzer-Prize winning journalists like The New York Times’ James Risen — who won a long unjust battle for simply doing his job — called President Obama the “greatest enemy of press freedom in a generation,” and a non-partisan Center of Effective Government report found Hillary Clinton’s State Department as one of the least transparent agencies, the American people could really use a transparent administration. That means no more backroom deals or threatening of journalists for revealing astounding information deserving to the public — and that is something Kim Kardashian could deliver.
Being the reality TV star she is, Kardashian would most likely air her presidential duties on Keeping Up With the Kardashians. How amazing would it be? Her one-on-one meetings with Japan’s Prime Minister Shinzo Abe featured on the next episode of KUWTK. Furthermore, Kardashian’s expertise (or addiction) with social media will give her direct access to the American people providing constant coverage on what she’s doing as the leader of the free world.
I don’t know about you, but I’d appreciate a tweet from the next @POTUS: “UGH. ISIL NEEDS TO STOP NOW. [mad emoji] No more airstrikes pls, but these def contractors are telling me to do it. Prayers love [prayer hands emoji][heart emoji]”
Kardashian Understands The Importance of Privacy Rights
You’d probably heard this dumb talking point before: “Kim Kardashian is only famous for her sex tape.” Well, the haters forgot one important thing: Her sex tape with then-boyfriend Ray J was leaked without her consent to Vivid Entertainment. Yes, there’s a conspiracy out there that she leaked it herself. However, would it make any sense for Kardashian to win a million-dollar legal settlement if she committed the crime herself? No, it wouldn’t.
But that’s what makes Kardashian so great on privacy rights. She took legal action against the distributor of a home video meant for private purposes. I’d only expect her to take on the National Security Agency by scaling back their mass surveillance on American citizens. Heck, Snowden even pointed out that NSA agents were passing around nude photos they were able to obtain.
The big headlines — Clinton, Scott Walker, and Marco Rubio — all made it clear that they support state-sponsored surveillance as currently operated by the NSA’s USA Freedom Act. It would only make sense for Kardashian to join the ranks of Bernie Sanders and Rand Paul when it comes to protecting our Fourth Amendment rights.
Long story short: No one understands the importance of privacy rights than Kim Kardashian. Unlike other political candidates who are immune from such actions, Kardashian lived through the consequences of the invasion of privacy.
Kardashian Is Great For Identity Politics, Family Values, & Equality
It’s clear that Kim Kardashian is a feminist. Being half-Armenian makes her a woman of color. Her daughter North West is biracial, and Caitlyn Jenner is a Republican transgender woman. This is gold for identity politics, because Kardashian supports everyone.
As much as people lament on the use of “identity politics,” it’s been around for decades. The GOP fights for “traditional values” and/or “Christian values” while the Democrats makes it known that they stand for LGBTQ equality. And Kardashian gets it all.
Kardashian lives by example. She’s proven her commitment to family values by taking care of her daughter, encouraging her siblings, and being one of the first to support Caitlyn Jenner’s transition. If that well-rounded support for all people isn't what you want in a president, I don't know what is.
Kanye West Would Be First Man & That Would Be Epic For The Right Reasons
Sure, you might think Kanye West is an egomaniac. But how is that different from all the other politicians in Washington? Actually, it could make him far more qualified for the position as First Man of the United States.
Say what you will, but there’s one thing we ought to appreciate about Yeezus. He tells it like it is and we know what he stands for — and it’s not just Beyoncé. West has repeatedly criticized the criminal justice system, the Drug War, and the War on Terror before it was cool. His music career has shifted, mainly in his latest album YEEZUS, into focusing on the experiences of Black America. And now, more than ever, we need a power couple to tackle on race-relations and police brutality far more aggressively.
In “New Slaves,” “Black Skinhead,” and “Blood On The Leaves,” West made references to the new racism black communities face in the United States whether it be through stereotypes or systemic institutions. In a remix of his critically-acclaimed single “Power,” West stated that the U.S. needs to keep their hands off of Iran and reached out to the Middle East by rapping a few lyrics in Arabic.
Also, unlike any other power couple, Kardashian and West both visited the Nation of Islam. In an interview with radio show The Breakfast Club, West talked about potentially creating a documentary on the Nation of Islam’s leader Minister Louis Farrakhan. He even compared Kardashian to the religious leader with good reason:
In the same way my wife got stamped with a sex tape, the Minister was stamped with [bigotry] and it’s important that while he’s still alive he sees the people appreciate his message. If you ever hear him talk, it’s about humanity. It’s about one race.
West and Kardashian are outspoken about their devotion to the Christian faith, but this level of interfaith is exactly what this country needs.