This Adult Version Of 'Oh, The Places You'll Go' Will Crush Whatever Hope You Had Left In Your Dead Millennial Heart — PHOTOS

High school and college graduation speeches paint a lovely, but slightly skewed picture of the real world. They cite Oh, The Places You'll Go, because Dr. Seuss' coming of age book was supposedly appropriate for any and all graduation scenarios. Recently, some brilliant person of the Internet tried their hand at rewriting Dr. Seuss' masterpiece, and they really hit the nail on the head with the new and improved: "Oh, The Places You'll Go (As An Adult)". It gets real. No "one fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish" nonsense—It's cut and dry and straight to the point. Just the way mama likes it. (Mama = all millennials and digital age participants, in this case.)

If there's one thing most 20-somethings can agree on, it's that adulthood isn't all it's cracked up to be. The whole ~no bedtime~ thing is great, but does it matter when we have to get up early for work anyway? Not really. And being able to spend our money on anything we want is dope. But once we pay rent, and utilities, there's not a whole lot of cash to spare.

Dr. Seuss's Oh, The Places You'll Go says, "You're off to great places. Today is your day! Your mountain is get on your way!"

What mountain? I assume they're talking about the happy hour bill that's waiting for me.

Here's the new and improved Oh, The Places You'll Go:

Take solace in the fact that the Internet will keep modernizing random old adages to be more realistic, and keep plugging at the whole "adult" thing.

Images: The WB; Imgur