With the first eviction in Season 17 of Big Brother fast approaching, all attention is being paid to which house traditions from previous seasons will make a return this summer and which ones will be a thing of the past. I'm pretty sure one tradition we can count on making a comeback is slop — mostly because it would just be a shame if it didn't. What is slop, though? The oatmeal-like food doled out as punishment to houseguests who lose certain challenges is a fan favorite, and has always added an element of drama and downright torture that viewers love.
Man — as if being stuck in a brightly lit house with no Chipotle for three months wasn’t bad enough.
As for which slop should return, there are a few options: different brands of slop that have been known to be used in the Big Brother house, but the dish is essentially always porridge/oatmeal sort of thing that the losing contestants are forced to eat for a certain amount of time.
No big deal, you say? Think again — because there are some serious side effects to eating nothing but slop that tend to make the season’s game play all the more interesting. As Online Big Brother points out, houseguests on a strict slop diet often experience weight loss, lack of energy, emotional instability (WOO!), and sometimes life-threatening allergies. (OK, so this only happened once in Season 9, but it was still REALLY intense.)
Thankfully there is a long list of condiments that the houseguests are allowed to use to garnish and spice up their bowls of slop, so I thought it would be nice to list up options to help viewers whip up a few concoctions from this list of allowed ingredients, if they feel so inclined. You know, for when you’re feeling super brave and into living like a houseguest. Or when you throw your next Big Brother 17 viewing party.
First off, here are the general ingredients to the show's actual slop, as detailed by Starcasm. When mixed together, they create a sort of porridge:
Natural oats, proprietary blend of whey protein concentrate, soy protein isolate, wheat protein isolate, milk protein isolate, natural and artificial flavors, vitamins and minerals (vitamin A palmitate, thiamine mononitrate, riboflavin, pyridoxine hydrochloride, cyanocobalamin, vitamin D3, alpha tocopherol, niacin, biotin, pantothenic acid, calcium carbonate, magnesium oxide, zinc oxide, copper gluconate, manganese sulfate, ferrous sulfate, folic acid, potassium iodide), cellulose gum, salt and acesulfame potassium.
Delicious. So, what's best to mix with this combination of... interesting ingredients? Without further ado… your dinner:
1. Slop Pizza
No, there’s no cheese allowed on the condiment list, but there are some other crucial ingredients required for pizza. Top your bowl of slop with a drizzle of olive oil, a dash of crushed red pepper, and some nice basil leaves from the garden. Delish-ish.
2. Sweet Slop
For when you’re craving something other than beige mush: Mix honey, vanilla, brown sugar, and white sugar in with your slop and try to imagine it’s cookies.
3. Deep Fried Slop
Vegetable oil is on the condiment list! So cook your slop on the stove until it’s nice and thick. While the slop reduces down, heat a pan of oil on high. Once both are ready, form the slop into small balls and drop them, four-at-a-time, into the hot oil. Fry for four minutes or until cooked all the way through.
4. BBQ Slop
A little BBQ sauce, a little honey, a dash of brown sugar, and you have yourself one heck of a summer treat.
5. Slop Burgers
Top your slop with all the fixins: ketchup, mayo, mustard, pickles, and relish. Use your hands as burger buns because that’s definitely not on the list of allowed foods.
6. Italian Trio Slop
For the real chefs in the crowd, stir in some rosemary, basil, and oregano. (That’s the trio.) Then, in a sauce pan, reduce the balsamic vinegar down to a glaze. It will take about twenty minutes, so cook it on a low simmer until it’s nice and thick and your kitchen smells like balsamic heaven. Drizzle glaze over your bowl of slop and have yourself a feast.
7. Bulk-Up Slop
For the body conscious houseguests in the crowd: stir in some protein powder and have at that flavorless junk.
8. British Slop
Think of it like an afternoon tea service! Without the scones. And the jam. And the clotted cream. INSTEAD, mix with white sugar and tea and make sure to eat with your pinkies up. Isn’t that totally just as good?
Feeling inspired? Well then, gather up these ingredients and get to sloppin’!
Want more Big Brother? Bustle’s App has you covered. It’s THE go-to place for any BB fan looking for round-the-clock Season 17 updates. BUT FIRST, you need to download the app from iTunes.
Image: CBS (9)