At this point in Miley Cyrus' career I find myself thinking "oh, it was only a matter of time" a lot. It's not that I entirely know what I mean with that — it just feels like a matter of time. But a matter of time before what? Before Miley Cyrus lit up in public? That one makes sense. Before she bleaches her eyebrows? Before she performs at the American Music Awards in cat underwear?
Haha, who am I kidding, that last part isn't weird at all, this is pop music we're talking about. What was alarming was the GIANT CAT LIP-SYNCHING ALONG TO HER SONG right behind her, like Bella Swan's horrifying CGI baby in Breaking Dawn.
Yeah, Miley Cyrus belted out "Wrecking Ball," showing off an impressive hipbone while emoting just about as much as a person can when standing in front of a giant lip-synching cat.
"I put you high up in the sky and now you're never coming down," she sings, tearing up, and you're wondering if she's talking about the cat or about Liam Hemsworth and I really hope it's the cat.
It had the effect a good (define "good" literally however you want to here) Miley Cyrus performance should have — namely, making you question if you accidentally took a lot of drugs before this show started, and if so, why they took so damn long to kick in.
Because then the cat starts crying. At the emotional climax of the song. It's in a giant spiderweb and it's crying and I don't know what to do, America.
I have so many questions. Is Miley Cyrus a cat now? Has she become one with it? Is it her overlord? Is it our overlord?
So many questions.