I don't identify as an outright anxious person, but I do have anxious tendencies. For example, I'm super guilty of over-apologizing. I...won't say it. As such, I gotta speak out for my kin: there are several scenarios all secretly anxious people find horrifying.
Honestly, I never even much considered myself as anxious or high-strung until recently, despite very obvious signs such as a jaw-clenching habit, OCD-ish cleaning habits, lab rat heart rate. A platonic, long-time friend of mine was visiting and amidst my sputtering around the kitchen, he noted aloud, "You're very...particular." It turns out he's fairly spot-on. I've started to notice how my inner harmony hinges on outer elements going in a particular way. I need order in my physical environment to feel at peace in my guts and brain. It's annoying, but that's how it goes.
Secretly anxious people try desperately to keep their cool, despite outside forces threatening to melt it into oblivion. It's tough but I like to think I usually do a pretty good job at burying my at-times intense discomfort during times normal people feel totally fine. Though often I look up from my own silent affirmations to catch gaze with a fellow secretly anxious person. Some common situations for this include:
When a hot dating prospect says "let's hang sometime"
Hang? Sometime? You're a trashcan but I'll try to be patient/not-so-dang secretly anxious.
When you're out, far from home sans charger, and your phone reads only 20 percent battery
Even if you 100 percent understand how to get home and you're not expecting any urgent calls or texts, this is absolutely horrifying. WHAT IF? You may or may not use the last bits of phone juice to locate a Best Buy to purchase your seventh charger. It's an investment!!
When it's cloudy and you realize you don't have an umbrella
YOU MIGHT ACTUALLY MELT.
When you're waiting to hear your name or number but the announcements are unclear
My living hell when visiting the car wash place, honestly. It's all muffled! And what if I miss it completely? So instead I end up sitting ~chill~, reading for two hours passively wondering what the hell happened to my sedan. (This has happened. Twice.)
When a dining buddy hasn't made a decision by the time the server asks for orders
I find this so annoying because it's like...pick literally anything. There's no way your selection will lead to a lasting, detrimental impact on your mortal life. Unless you have severe food allergies, close your eyes and thumb at a random item. You'll live.
When a car is honking in traffic and you can't tell why
How am I catastrophically messing up this driving thing?? WHAT DO YOU WANT?
When you can't determine where a siren noise is coming from
Pull over? Keep driving? Flash lights? Where are you??
When you ran out of time to look up directions before going somewhere new
Siri has no "neurotic" setting, so.
When someone places a container with liquids NOT in the middle of a surface
Nope.
When you get a FaceTime call but you're not fully clothed
You suspect — somehow — they know. And can see you. For sure.
When an unexpected phone call rings...and you HAVE to answer
Like, it's a work thing. Or a delivery person is lost thing. The worst part is you MUST answer and act like you are a functioning human who can navigate phone conversations without having to panic and turn down the blasting Nelly album prior to the call. Ugh.
Images: NBC; Giphy(11)
