Love Island Is My Major League Sports Team

The first episode of Love Island USA feels a lot like opening day for a sports fan like me: There’s tension in the air, there are (literal) fireworks in the sky, and I can’t wait to see what will unfold. To get myself ready to watch the show, which kicked off June 2, I grabbed a snack and made my way to the couch where I sat on the edge of my seat for the full 96 minutes. Yes, I yelled. And yes, I threw popcorn at my screen.

As the Islanders entered the villa, each wearing their fanciest ‘fits, all I could see was a reality TV-show version of a WNBA tunnel walk. (Loved Aniya Harvey’s orange dress, BTW.) Cut to me sizing people up and taking mental notes on who’s most likely to win — all based on nothing more than a hunch. I’m the same when watching the season opening games for the MLB, and when the torch is lit at the Olympics. Suddenly, I’m an expert in athletics and overly invested in outcomes. For me, Love Island is just another sports league to add to the list.

While I could passively stream the show while folding laundry, I’m 100% going to take it way too seriously and make it my entire personality for the next six weeks. As Ariana Madix entered the villa and couples began to form, something primal shifted in my brain: I was no longer just a girl at home with her cute TV show, but a rabid fan with bulging forehead veins.

Of course, that meant I would need someone to root for. As a south Jersey girl born and raised, I immediately set my eyes on Sincere Rhea, who hails from the tiny town of Cape May, New Jersey, and Melanie Moreno, who’s originally from nearby Philly. The pair is officially coupled up, and when they said where they’re from, I stood up and cheered, especially when Moreno said she “bleeds green.” I knew I needed a foam finger with their names on it.

Just like an Eagles fan who can’t stop talking about touchdowns and trades, I was blowing up my group chat with theories and impassioned voice notes: “What do they keep saying Bryce is old? In this essay, I will...” I’d only known about these Islanders for an hour, and yet there I sat with their stats already memorized: ages, names, dating history, and more. My friends, on the other hand, were long asleep.

The next morning, I scoured the internet for Love Island watch parties, desperate to be around like-minded people. I yearned to cram myself in a busy bar, arm-to-arm with those who get it. And after the finale airs in mid-July? Thank God football season will be right around the corner.