Father's Day
11 Father's Day Limericks To Add To Your Card This Year
You don’t have to be a poet to show you care.

On Father’s Day, you want to show your dad how much you care. That being said, not everyone is sappy or sentimental when it comes to holidays so sometimes you need an extra hand. If poetry isn’t your forte but you want to spruce up your Father’s Day card for dad, try these limericks that are anything but basic and will show your old man you care.
I
We don't make you breakfast in bed
Our greeting cards hardly get read
No flowers or pies
You're drowning in ties
You'll hit the golf course alone instead
II
On Sunday you break out the grill
Our family's of a thrill
The burgers get burnt
So hungry, we turned
To the steakhouse, where you foot the bill
III
One day when mom wasn't near
You gave me my first sip of beer
It tasted like piss
"Why do people drink this?"
Funny how things change with the years
IV
To embarrass us is your life's goal
To you, puns can never get old
Our friends think you're great
Your scare away our dates
But we love your bad jokes, truth be told.
V
We had a catch when I was small
I got hit in the face, I recall
I started to cry
You wiped the tears from my eyes
And said, "There's no crying in baseball."
VI
Mine and my siblings' favorite time of the day
Was when Dad came home from being away
We'd run to the door
Socks sliding on the wood floor
Yelling "Daddy's home!", ready to play
VII
I read all the Father's Day cards
That make fun of dads and their farts
I thought it was just you
Who had dangerous toots
Of fatherhood, it must be a part
VIII
When it came to you breaking wind
Yours was the most terrible kind
You'd say "pull my finger"
Not a soul would linger
For you always ripped one and grinned.
IX
On road trips, you were put to the test
Even before the phones had GPS
You'd get us there and back
You'd need no stinkin' map
Your navigation was always the best
X
Whether climbing on top of your back
Or getting thrown through the air like flapjacks
Your body and limbs
Were our own jungle gym
There was no playground better than that
XI
You can't pick us up anymore
Or play baseball without getting sore
You're losing your hair
There's wrinkles everywhere
But we love you even more than before
Image: Manoj Vasanth / Flickr