5 Non-Physical Intimacy Ideas To Try With Your Partner

It doesn’t have to be spicy to spice things up.

These 6 non-physical intimacy ideas from TikTok are sure to strengthen your relationship.
martin-dm/E+/Getty Images

Intimacy is much more than a physical connection. It’s a bond built with another person (or even yourself), and though it’s often formed through physicality, that’s not the only way to achieve closeness. Whether you’re exchanging stories or completing solo activities as a pair, there are so many non-physical ways to improve intimacy with your partner, and these hacks from TikTok can help.

Synchronizing your breathing and kissing your beau for six seconds are just a few of the simple intimacy-building tactics that experts swear by. But truth be told, outward displays of affection aren’t the only thing that’ll strengthen your connection. According to sex therapist and TikTok creator Casey Tanner (@queersextherapy), intimacy can be formed on emotional, physical, sensory, or intellectual levels as well. By putting an emphasis on non-physical forms of intimacy, you’re not only deepening your connection, but you’re also proving to the other person that you value your relationship outside the bedroom just as much as you do inside.

As a reminder, intimacy improvement hacks aren’t exactly one size fits all. Feel free to make adjustments to any of these tips as needed, and do what feels most natural for you and your other half.

Acts Of Service

Even if it’s not your partner’s love language, they might still enjoy an act of service every once in a while. Therapist and TikTok creator Logan Cohen (@healinghumanity777) lists doing your significant other’s least favorite chore without telling them as one of 10 things you can do to build non-physical intimacy. Other good deeds the expert suggests include cooking your partner’s favorite meal or performing community service together, but you can also default to other love languages like words of affirmation by giving each other genuine compliments, or even exchanging love letters as if they were a gift.

Sharing Music

TikTok user @butterfly.priestess explains that one of their favorite forms of non-physical intimacy is sharing music with one another, but not in the way you’d think. Though the creator acknowledges that sharing playlists can be “very cute and very intimate,” they advise sharing music in a way that’s “accompanied by the stories in which the music had an impact on you in some way.” To do this, the TikToker suggests having your partner play you a batch of songs that are important to them, and recite a memory they have attached to each song.

Mutual Problem Solving

Casey Tanner recommends presenting your partner with an issue that you can both solve together to create that non-physical bond. “It can be as big as a fight you got in with your boss, or as small as ‘I don’t know what outfit to wear tonight to our date,’ says the expert. “Go to your partner with this problem and ask them genuinely, earnestly for their opinion. Allow them into something that you’re struggling with, big or small, and see how that creates emotional intimacy.”

Reading Out Loud

Another suggestion from @butterfly.priestess is to read out loud to one another. The creator explains why they find this to be such an effective bonding tool, saying, “I feel like it’s such a beautiful expression of this person — I get to hear their voices, I get to hear how they think about characters’ voices, I get to hear how they’re experiencing the novel as they read it, and there’s just something so beautiful about that, and so intimate about that.”

Doing Solo Activities Together

Try welcoming your partner into your solo activities and see what that does for your relationship. Not only will this increase your one-on-one time, but it’ll also invite them into your world. From working out to napping, if it can be done together, it’s worth a shot.