Life

13 Sex Acts That Sound Way Better On Paper

by Lea Rose Emery
BDG Media, Inc.

If you're looking for a new type of sex to try, it's important to remember that some things sound a lot better in theory than they are in real life. I have my own opinions on this (SHOWER SEX, SHOWER SEX, SHOWER SEX), but the people of Reddit decided to share theirs. And it turns out there are some sexual acts and sexual fantasies that work way better on paper than they do in reality.

Now, it shouldn't stop you from experimenting. You still want to keep things fresh and avoid a sex rut. “A relationship is like a bicycle, when one of the wheels is flat, it will still go, but not well," Eric Marlowe Garrison, sex and relationship counselor, and author of the book Mastering Multiple Position Sex. "Even if only one partner is in that sex rut, it's going to affect the relationship sexually. When you need something that your partner doesn’t need, it's difficult to understand why they don't need it." Not only that, some things that other people don't like may be great for you — everyone's different. But it's good to see that you really need to experience things for yourself. Because in theory it sounds great, but in reality everyone has their own preferences.

Here's what Reddit users said just didn't work for them:

1Anal

It can be great... but it can be absolute worst if you're not ready.

2The Ocean

Those aren't the rolling waves that we normally want during sex.

3'Super-Glue Instead Of A Lubricant'

Oh no.

4The Sand

NEVER EVER, EVER AGAIN.

5Whipped Cream

That sounds distinctly underwhelming.

6Frosting

I love frosting, but that's just too much.

769

OK, 69 can also be kind of meh. But it's worse with a fart involved.

8Lightsaber

So I think that actually sounds kind of amazing, but to each their own.

9Cock Ring

Sounds like a pretty awkward distraction.

10Baby Oil

This guy has some very strong feelings about baby oil.

11Shower Sex

I have been saying this about shower sex FOR YEARS.

12A Threeway With A Friend

Sometimes you can see too much of each other.

13Movie Theater Sex

You can focus on the film or the sex... not good for either.

You may love some of these sex acts, but for some people they just don't work. What it shows is that you have to try things for yourself — because some things are just way better in theory.