Life
Fall is upon us, and we all know what the best thing about fall is. Stepping on crunchy leaves? No, the other thing. Halloween everything? No, the other thing. Squishy sweaters and crocheted hats? NO, THE OTHER THING. Pumpkin! Redditors have compiled a list of the 14 pumpkin items we're most excited about this year, and the basic witch inside of me is squealing with joy and can't wait to whip out her Ugg boots and sweatpants that say "sexy" across the butt.
Pumpkin has become iconic of autumn the way garland is iconic of Christmas, the way white doves are iconic of peace, the way Cheetos and small hands are iconic of POTUS. Nobody can be in a grumpy mood when our favorite stores, restaurants, and cafes whisper those sweet, seductive words in our ears: "Seasonal flavors have arrived."
Arguably the most famous of the squash family, the pumpkin has a global fanbase that loves working it into every edible item imaginable. The seasonal ingredient is so delicious that even people who hate pumpkin love pumpkin. And if you somehow have any friends who argue against the delectable delight that is pumpkin-flavored everything, it's time to get new friends.
In celebration of fall (I know, I know, it doesn't officially start until September 22, whateverrr), here are 14 items we're itching to get our hands on.
1
Pumpkin Tea
My name is Megan, and I approve of this message.
2
Stuffed Pumpkin
This sounds like heaven on earth. Who is this person, and can they invite me over for dinner? Can I just invite myself? See you soon!
3
Pumpkin Beer
11 out of 10 experts agree this is the only acceptable way to get drunk.
4
Pumpkin Pie Blizzards
Is it pumpkin? Is it pie? Is it ice cream whipped into a frenzie? WHO KNOWS.
5
Pumpkin Spice Doughnuts
It's true! This is a one-day-only pumpkin celebration. I know the eighth is a Friday and we'll all be working; but seriously, screw work.
6
Good Ol' Pumpkin Pie
Alright. Traditional. I can get onboard with that.
7
Pumpkin Spiced Pumpkin Seeds
Pumpkin flavored pumpkin seeds sound like they would confuse me, but I love Trader Joe's with every pumpkiny fiber of my being.
8
Pumpkin Spice Frappuccinos
This Starbucks seasonal offering is all of your wildest dreams combined into one mouthwatering drink.
9
Pumpkin Muffins
Where does this person work, and how can I apply for a job there?
10
Pumpkin Oatmeal
Plain oatmeal is only enjoyable if you like the taste of concrete. But pumpkin spice oatmeal? Now we're talking.
11
Pumpkin Spice Latte
It's baaaack! Starbucks had no idea the PSL would grow into the famous drink it is today, complete with its own Twitter page.
12
Pumpkin Soup
Soup is the ultimate cold-weather comfort food. Pumpkin soup? I can't even let my mind go there. It might not come back.
13
Pumpkin Kettle Corn
I can easily envision myself elbow-deep in a bag of this stuff.
14
Pumpkin Dip
I want to dip my whole face in this.
15
That One Debbie Downer
Haters gonna hate.
