In the life of any person with a brother, there are three great challenges: finding someone to referee your childhood battles over whose turn it is on the computer, calling "dibs" on your leftovers so they don't mysteriously ~disappear~, and shopping for aforementioned brother. If the last of the three is troubling you as of late and you need a cool gift idea for your sibling, allow me to introduce you to some
funny 2017 gifts for your brother that he will l.o.v.e. Shopping for brothers is kind of like the Bermuda Triangle: nobody really gets it. Most are practical creatures; if they need something, they buy it. That means when it comes time to give them a gift, you're out of ideas. Your brother already has that fancy nose hair trimmer you saw online. He already bought that expensive leather briefcase with a hidden pocket for a flask. He doesn't need anything. So, where does that leave you?
Well, you have two options: you can either buy him something super practical that he uses all the time, like hand sanitizer and paper towel (...zzz...), or you can buy him something silly to make him laugh. That leaves you with these 17
gifts that are fun, funny, and also affordable, because let's face it — most of what you buy your brother ends up in the back of his closet anyway.
BigMouth Inc. Fanny Bank
Your brother always had a gross sense of humor. Help him be financially responsible
and cater to his funny side with this fanny piggy bank. Bonus: it farts when you put a coin in. He has to have this. BigMouth Inc. Fanny Bank, $15, Amazon
Lazy Housekeeper Mop Slippers
If cleaning isn't his strong suit, grab your brother a pair of shoes that double as mops. His tile will be sparkling and he didn't even have to lift a finger. Just a foot.
Lazy Housekeeper Mop Slippers, $8, Archie McPhee
You tried getting your bro hooked on the lavender and warm vanilla potpourri you use in your own home, but alas, he resisted. Get him the next best air freshener money can buy. The scent of grease and frying swine will permeate his entire abode and bring a happy tear to his eye.
Accoutrements Bacon Air Freshener, $5, Walmart
Is your brother not the sharpest tool in the shed? Make shower time a little easier for him. He'll sleep better knowing that he didn't dry his face with the same end he used to dry his... *ahem.* Nobody's got time for that.
CafePress - Face/Butt Towel, $37, Amazon
Giant Fist Beer Can Koozie
There's only one appropriate way to drink an ice cold beer: out of a GIANT fist koozie. We weren't put on this earth to drink out of a normal, boring koozie. Life's too short.
Giant Fist Beer Can Koozie, $10, Walmart
Does your brother spend a good deal of time on the can? While most of us like to scroll through Instagram while we relieve ourselves, who says you can't improve your swing while you're in there? Help him kill two birds with one stone — going poo while staying physically fit with the most boring sport known to mankind. FORE!
Table Games Potty Golfing, $10, Amazon
The Grill Sergeant Ultimate BBQ Apron
No one works a grill like your brother, and he'll truly appreciate this apron that holds everything but the kitchen sink. This is the Swiss army knife of BBQ aprons, with space for six drinks or bottles, a bottle opener, jar pockets for your spices, extra large tool pockets, and more.
The Grill Sergeant Ultimate BBQ Apron, $22, Stupid.com
Is your brother one of those special people who wears socks with his sandals? Aw, that's cute. Not really. Help him cut to the chase with socks that look like sandals with socks.
Sandal Socks, $7, Prezzybox
Your brother and his receding hairline will be so happy with this blow-up toupee. Who needs expensive wigs and hair transplants when you can get a new head of hair for less than $10? That's a bargain. You're, like, the best sister ever.
Inflatable Toupee, $9, Prezzybox
Donald Trump Toilet Paper
loves Donald Trump. Maybe he hates him. Either way, your brother will feel so much better knowing that POTUS had a hand in keeping his tush clean. Trump Novelty Toilet Paper, $20, Amazon
You can't expect him to simply ask for a beer; that's entirely too much work. No, brother likes to kick up his feet and relax. And with these socks, when he does so, he'll subtly alert the people around him that he's a bit parched and ready for another brewski.
Bring Me A Beer Socks, $7-$16, Amazon
Does your brother love to enjoy a glass of whiskey, scotch, or bourbon on the rocks? Who doesn't? As an added bonus, this glass is dishwasher safe, which is terrific because we all know he won't wash it by hand.
Good Day/Bad Day Glass, $17, Amazon
Stars Wars Millennium Falcon Book Light
Oh, brother. He's always been good with words. And flatulence. Leave it to him to make a fart sound like such a beautiful thing. This mug was made for him.
I Didn't Fart Mug, $18, Amazon
Sometimes, it's the smallest dilemmas that get men all bent out of shape. If your brother is often plagued by life-changing, earth-shattering questions like, "Should I change the channel?" these flowcharts will steer him in the right direction.
Inconsequential Dilemmas, $16, Uncommon Goods