Most kids go to great lengths to avoid
watching certain movies with their parents. Basically, if a film looked like it would have a lot of sex in it when you were young, then you probably would come up with some excuse to avoid seeing it because there's nothing more awkward than watching a sex scene with your mom and dad. Now that you're adults, the prospect of doing so is actually even more frightening than when you were younger. So as a public service to all of you who feel this way, here's a list of Netflix movies you shouldn't watch with your parents.
Most of these movies are totally fine to watch on your own, with friends, or with your significant other, but there's just something about the idea of watching these films with the people who conceived you that'll make your stomach turn. And while some of these films are quite obviously soft-core porn that can be easily avoided (looking at you,
Nymphomaniac), others are much sneakier with how they work in their scandalous subject matter. Both types of movies are included on this list, so take note of the 19 films below and you'll know what to avoid the next time your parents want to watch a little Netflix with you. 1 'Duck Butter'
Yes, this movie has a funny title. And yes, it's technically a comedy. And yes, that is Alia Shawkat from
Arrested Development. But before you add it to your parents' queue, know that the plot centers on two women trying to have sex 24 times in one day. Yeah. 2 'The Little Hours'
This comedy features a group of Medieval nuns exploring their sexuality, which depending on who your parents are, might just be considered the most blasphemous thing they've ever seen. Avoid it unless you want your folks to tell you that you need to go to church more.
3 ‘Nymphomaniac, Vols. 1 & 2’
One of — OK, two of — the most controversial films to be released this decade, this two movie collection is more or less watching people have sex for four hours. Is that really how you want to spend an evening with your parents?
4 ‘Blue Is The Warmest Color’
This French movie received wild critical acclaim upon its release in 2013, but as you may have heard, the French hold looser attitudes toward sexuality than Americans. As such, this film features a ton of raunchy sex scenes, some of which involve high schoolers.
5 ‘Gerald's Game’
This Netflix original film is based on the Stephen King story of the same name, and it's more disturbing than most of the author's work — which is saying something. Star Carla Gugino spends practically the entirety of the film handcuffed to a bed after her husband dies while attempting to act out a roleplaying rape fantasy. Yikes.
6 ‘Under The Skin’
Scarlett Johansson received critical acclaim for her role as a mostly-silent alien in this bizarre indie film. But unless your parents are cinephiles, you'll likely want to avoid watching this with them as the MCU star spends most of the film seducing random Scottish dudes and having them strip naked before following into a black void. Many Scottish penises abound.
Oh, it's a Nicholas Hoult movie! He's an X-Man, how awkward could this movie be? Considering that it's all about millennial hook up culture, filled with sex scenes, and is unrated, the answer is... extremely awkward.
8 ‘Below Her Mouth’
The provocative title of this film should give you a pretty good idea of what you're in for, but in case you need more info, it's described as an "erotic romance" where two women meet and have an intense sexual affair.
9 9 . ‘Tucker & Dale Vs. Evil’
This is a parody of those ultra-violent and sex-filled camp slasher movies. You know, the kind you wouldn't go near with your parents back when you were in high school. But guess what? Even though this film is only parodying those types of movies, it is still ultra-violent and sex-filled in its own right.
10 ‘Spring Breakers’
You can assure your parents all you want that your spring break trips in college were completely innocent, but after they watch this they'll be convinced you hung out with drug dealers, robbed diners, and did basically everything else they always told you never to do.
11 ‘The Package’
This Netflix original comedy stars a bunch of high schoolers who take a camping trip together. Sounds innocent enough, but then one of them
cuts off his own penis and the rest of the movie is about him trying to get it reattached. 12 ‘Teenage Cocktail'
Good luck convincing your parents to continue paying for your internet service after watching this film about two teen girls who start a webcam business and end up putting themselves in serious danger.
13 ‘A Perfect Ending'
A middle-aged woman tries to get in touch with her sexuality with the help of a high-class female escort. This is one seriously erotic film, and not the type to watch while squeezed between your middle-aged parents on their couch as they exchange knowing glances over you.
14 ‘American Psycho'
If the thought of seeing a sex worker chased around by a naked, chainsaw-wielding Christian Bale seems like something you'd like to watch with your folks, then by all means, give this cult classic a go. If not, then steer clear.
15 ‘Blue Valentine'
A critical darling, this indie romance starring Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams notoriously received an NC-17 rating (which was successfully appealed and reduced to an R) prior to its release due to an explicit oral sex scene.
16 ‘Sleeping With Other People'
Of all the films on this list, this comedy starring a pair of lovable NBC alums is probably the least awkward. But it's still a story about millennial hookup culture and the title is literally called
Sleeping With Other People and do you really want your parents wondering about your dating life? 17 ‘Tusk'
This movie is straight up disgusting. It's about a mad scientist who kidnaps a podcaster in order to turn him into a human walrus. There's loads of ultra disturbing body horror, and if you recommend this to your parents they will likely leave you out of all future Christmas cards.
18 ‘Zack & Miri Make A Porno'
Yes, this is a big studio comedy starring household names Elizabeth Banks and Seth Rogen. It's also about two friends who decide to make a porno together. It's right there in the title! Why would you watch this with your parents?! There are plenty of other less awkward movies starring Banks or Rogen you can watch.
Another French film, this 2015 erotic drama
used real, non-simulated sex scenes. People legit have sex on camera in this movie. Not only that, but there is a closeup scene where a penis ejaculates directly into the camera that was filmed in 3D. So, uh, this probably isn't the film on which to test out mom and dad's new 3D TV.
These movies would all make for one seriously awkward night in with your parents, so it's best to avoid them at all costs.
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This article was originally published on
Aug. 22, 2017