Even though planning a modern wedding allows for plenty of opportunities to think outside the box, many weddings still feel heavily weighed down by outdated traditions that just don't make any sense today. But Modern Rebel, an alternative event planning company, is helping couples throw out some outdated wedding ideas in favor of modern, inclusive celebrations.
"The way to make weddings more inclusive is to throw out any idea you have of what a wedding should be," Ainsley Blattel, VP and lead planner, and Amy Shackelford, CEO and founder of Modern Rebel, tell Bustle. "We take a 'no assumptions' approach to the planning process, which means we ask our couples how they identify and how they want their love party to look."
There are a lots of problematic aspects of traditional wedding, from a female perspective — because women have traditionally been objectified by the wedding process — right down to the language used.
"One of the biggest changes we’ve seen modern couples change is the language used during ceremony," Blattel and Shackelford say. "So many wedding 'traditions' stem from the time when women were literally property, so a lot of the language is framed around the transfer of ownership of the woman involved. It’s 2018 — women aren’t down for that." Instead, more and more couples are embracing the personalization of weddings —findingways to make the day more inclusive by throwing out the old rule book.
They also point out that the other side of the inclusivity coin has to do with the wedding industry — which is often dominated by white, cis, and Christian-leaning vendors. Modern Rebel tries to balance this by sourcing more diverse vendors who can bring other views and ideas to the wedding planning process.
Here are some outdated trends to ditch — and how to have a more inclusive party instead.