For many, an ideal relationship is a partnership, but it's not unusual to have a partner who's more passive and one who's more assertive in a relationship. Which can be OK — in moderation. But if the relationship is too unbalanced, you might not even realize it, but resentment can start to build. "The real problem here is that resentment can build up over time and, like rust, it never sleeps – it just silently eats away at your relationship," Gary Brown, PhD, LMFT, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Los Angeles who works with individuals and couples, tells Bustle. "As time goes on and the resentment builds it can reach the point where your partner actually begins to feel the worst form of resentment – bitterness. Once resentment reaches this state, a fair amount of damage has been done to the relationship."
If you have a tendency to be more passive, you should make sure that you're actually OK with it and that it's not slowly becoming a problem. It can be a thin line — a naturally passive person shouldn't have to change who they are — but it's an important thing to keep an eye on. Here's how you know if you've gotten too passive, because no matter what your personalities, you need to be an equal player.