Every Terrible Thing Eleanor From 'The Good Place' Did On Earth
It has been made very, extremely, abundantly clear that Eleanor from The Good Place was a terrible person on Earth. Throughout the course of the series, we've learned that her favorite "book" is Kendall Jenner's Instagram feed, her favorite show is the Real Housewives of Atlanta, and she's obsessed with professional wrestler "Stone Cold" Steve Austin — all things that could maybe, possibly be passable on their own, but together add up to a truly intolerable person. This is, after all, a woman who proudly describes herself as an Arizona dirtbag.
Much of her bad behavior can be traced back to her arguably worse parents, from whom she emancipated herself when she was a teenager. But Dead Eleanor knows she can't blame everything on her crappy family; she's come a long way since she dropped her bottle of Lonely Gal Margarita Mix, was dragged into the street by shopping carts, and got fatally struck by a truck advertising erectile dysfunction pills.
Now, with the new, self-aware Eleanor before us, it's almost heartening to look back at the terrible things she did on Earth — all of which deserve their own dedicated exhibit in the Bad Place's Museum of Human Misery.
1. Sold Fake Medication to the Elderly
Season 1, Episode 1. In a flashback, it's revealed that Eleanor used to peddle NasaPRO and NasaPRO Silver to the elderly. "Now, you can't legally call it 'medicine,' because it doesn't technically work," her boss explained to her. "And it is technically chalk."
But Eleanor had no qualms about the job, telling Chidi that she was so good at it, she "was the top salesperson five years running."
2. Heckled an Environmental Activist
Season 1, Episode 1. Eleanor eventually joined this organization when she was given a second chance on Earth, but only after outright terrorizing one representative in her previous life.
3. Stole Someone's Wallet
Season 1, Episode 1. In an effort to convince Chidi that she wasn't so bad on Earth, Eleanor reasoned that she, "never found a wallet outside of an IHOP and thought about returning it but saw the owner lived out-of-state so just took the cash and dropped the wallet back on the ground."
"O.K., that's really specific, and that makes me think that you definitely did do that," replied a troubled Chidi.
4. Overstepped Personal Boundaries
Season 1, Episode 5. "When I told a boyfriend something was 'no big deal,' it meant anything from 'I just bought weed from your nephew,' to 'I secretly befriended your ex-girlfriend last year, things got out of hand, and now I'm her bridesmaid,'" Eleanor told Chidi.
5. Abandoned Her Friend's Dog
Season 1, Episode 6. When Eleanor was supposed to be dog sitting for her friend, she left to see a Rihanna show in Las Vegas. To her credit, she did leave enough food out — the only problem was the dog ate so much that he had to be wheeled around in a wagon afterwards.
6. Pretended to Have a Terminal Illness
Season 1, Episode 7. In what she calls a "victimless crime," Eleanor explained that she once pretended to be terminally ill so that she could meet Scott Wolf at a Sunglass Hut.
7. The Dress Incident
Season 1, Episode 8. Eleanor once wore her roommate Madison's dress without permission, ripped it, then blamed it on the dry cleaners. When Madison flipped out in the store and threatened to sue the cleaners, a video of the incident ended up going viral — so naturally, Eleanor and her other roommate made T-shirts reading "Dress Bitch" (the nickname the internet gifted Madison with) and sold them. To top things off, Eleanor used the money she got from the T-shirts to buy the same dress she'd ripped, and kept it for herself.
8. Cyberbullied a Pregnant Woman from Spin Class...Among Other Things
Season 1, Episode 12. When Shawn visited Michael's neighborhood, they looked up Eleanor's worst life events, which include screaming at waiters (22 times), cyberbullying a pregnant woman from her spin class, getting a lifetime ban from a Build-A-Bear Workshop, showing a nine-year-old The Shining, having a "brief Instagram flirtation with Kid Rock," and getting into a staggering 88 "altercations with various youths selling various items for various fundraisers."
9. Stole Olives & Made An Old Man Fall Down
Season 2, Episode 7. "Whenever I would do something crappy on Earth, there would be a little tiny voice in the back of my head that would say, 'Eleanor, don't grab that handful of olives from the salad bar. You know you didn't pay for that,'" she told Michael. "Or 'Eleanor, don't spit those olive pits onto the floor of the grocery store. That's not cool.' Or 'Eleanor, that old man just slipped on your olive pit, and he fell down. Don't use the fact that everyone's distracted to go back and steal more olives.'"
10. Cheated On A BuzzFeed Quiz
11. Destroyed Multiple Escape Rooms
12. Stole Underwear From H&M
Season 4, Episode 2. Of all the bad things Eleanor did, stealing underwear from a fast fashion brand is one of the most unsavory.