How To Set Boundaries With Your Family, According To A Life Coach


When we’re young, most of us don’t think about how to set boundaries with our families. Our families, especially our parents, have a say in nearly every aspect of our lives, and we usually accept that — until we’re older and they continue trying to play this role. If your family members are trying to get information about you that you’re not comfortable sharing, push you into doing things you don’t want to do, or influence decisions that aren’t theirs to make, it may be time to set some boundaries with them.

“The bigger question isn’t even ‘how do I set boundaries,’ necessarily,” Washington, DC-based life coach Nick Hamilton tells Bustle. “It’s ‘how do I be my fully expressed self?’ Often, part of that is setting boundaries, and I think the hardest place to set boundaries is with our caregivers. That touches some of our deepest stories about how the world works.”

If you have trouble standing up to your parents or other family members, you're not alone. But with practice, you can get better at it — and as you do, you'll likely develop a healthier relationship with less resentment. Here are some ways to set boundaries with your family, or anyone else who isn't respecting you.