Kourtney Kardashian turned 39 on Wednesday, April 18, and on Thursday night her friends and family threw her a party that looked like it had just about everything. Kourtney Kardashian's birthday party will give you serious FOMO. Luckily, this is the family that documents everything (they will be studied in universities one day), so there was plenty of footage from the party captured by Kim Kardashian on her Snapchat and her Instagram story.
And it looks like a great party. For one, there are very few boys to be seen, save for Kanye West. In fact, it looks like Kanye is the only one. In any case, all of Kim's posts will really make you bummed you weren't there, if only for all the cakes.
First of all, Kris Jenner gave a very sentimental speech to Kourtney, her first born. Kris punctuated this speech with a drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other — smoking inside like it's the '90s! What she had to say to Kourtney was really sweet.
"You taught me how to be a mom. You taught me how to love. You taught me what being a mom was all about," she said. "You were the first — you were there first."
As if it wasn't clear already that Kourtney is the current favorite, Kris went on:
“I love you more than I can say. I love you more than life itself. You don’t even understand how much I love and adore you, and I appreciate you. You are the biggest blessing in my life and I thank you, Kourtney."
Wow, and with Kim and Kendall right there, too.
Other highlights included Kim and Kanye seriously making out — which felt very weird to watch, like a sequel to the "Bound 2" music video — and a series of piñatas shaped like... the Kardashians and their friends' heads.
The piñatas are hilarious and horrifying, kind of like The Polar Express but sloppier. Kim's piñata sort of looks like her, as much as papier-mâché can. It actually must be really fun and cathartic to bash your own head in.
Kourtney also got three whole cakes, including one of those very Instagram friendly unicorn cakes that's filled with M&Ms.
Kendall was there, of course, but Kylie and Khloé were not, for good reason. Khloé literally just had her baby, True Thompson, last Tuesday. And Kylie was recently in Houston with Travis Scott and has been spending time with their new baby, Stormi Webster. They went to a Houston Rockets game on Wednesday night, which was one of their rare public appearances together.
Besides Kourtney's birthday party on Thursday, she's been having an amazing birthday week. On Wednesday, she spent the day with her three kids, Mason, Penelope, and Reign, who made her an amazing ice cream scoop cake. There were also a bunch of balloons and yet another cake covered in gorgeous flowers. It seems like Kourtney truly loves a good cake. She also got a whole mess of flowers, because who doesn't get a garden for their birthday?
It's wild to think that the eldest Kardashian sister is turning 40 next year, and that the world has been keeping up with them since 2007. And that now there's a huge third generation of Kardashian-Jenners: Kourtney's got Mason, Penelope, and Reign; Kim has North, Saint and Chicago; Khloé's just welcomed True; Kylie's got Stormi; and Rob has Dream. Maybe one day Penelope will be celebrating her 39th birthday on the 714th season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians.
For now, happy birthday, Kourtney! Hopefully, smashing a piñata of Kim was the best birthday present ever.