If the Committee to Protect Journalists' International Press Freedom Awards doesn't sound like the place for invigorating celebrity news, you're not listening closely enough. At the 27th annual ceremony in New York on Nov. 16, it was revealed that Meryl Streep and Cher fought off an attacker together. The circumstances are unclear — it was some time ago and a third unnamed party was under attack, not one of the actors — but Streep and Cher fought off a violent assailant, because not all heroes wear capes. (Although, Cher is such a fashion icon, she may very well have been wearing a cape. Let's assume she was wearing a cape. Anyway.)
Streep gave a speech at the International Press Freedom Awards that was appropriately somber for the times. During her talk, the legend revealed that she had been the victim of assault on more than one occasion. The Oscar winner described a harrowing experience in which she seemingly disassociated to protect herself from a violent attacker. The circumstances surrounding that attack are vague, but that's not significant; what matters is that a renowned actor chose to share a personal trauma with the press, and it's unlikely such a revelation could happen in any previous year.
Also, on another occasion, Streep and Cher chased an attacker away from a potential victim. The internet took this news under consideration, and for once, could all agree on something: That's a blessed image.
1. Forget Batman & Robin, Fans Are Here For The Meryl & Cher Show
Same, TBH. Same.
2. Others Are Ready To Replace The Crimestoppers Number In His Phone With Meryl Or Cher's
Is Crimestoppers still a real organization? If not, maybe a goddess-themed bat signal would do the trick.
3. Another The Scenario One Step Further
Actually, since Streep didn't break the news until Nov. 16, it would appear that this is something this Twitter user thinks about in his free time. Relatable.
4. This Fan Purposefully Misunderstood The Headline In The Best Way Possible
Can you imagine? Can you imagine.
5. OneReally Liked The Concept Of Meryl Wielding Cher
No one stands a chance against two goddesses wearing spiked heels.
6. When Will The Government Weaponize Cher?
The mere concept of this image has officially incapacitated Jack McFarland from Will & Grace.
7. Seriously, The Internet Is So Here For Oscar Winner Attack Squad
This fan even did a little more digging. As it turns out, Cher once mentioned the same story to reporters in 2013. Streep and Cher versus a large potential mugger literal decades ago? Where is that film?
8. As Any Real Fan Knows, Their Next Film Together Is Mamma Mia 2
Not breaking, but just as important. Also, more people need to see that Cher GIF.
9. A Movie Pitch That Hollywood Needs To Pick Up ASAP
Hollywood, are you listening? HBO films? Netflix, maybe? Someone's got to be able to make this happen. Shut up and take my money, etc.
10. This Is The Best Take Of Them All
Justice League 2: What Liberals Want. Male Heroes Need Not Apply.
While Twitter had fun with the news, it's crucial to remember that Streep did not divulge this information lightly. She shared her personal experiences with the room to examine how a history of being disadvantaged and vulnerable — based on gender alone — heightened her awareness of "danger" in its many forms. She describes successfully chasing off an attacker with Cher as "a miracle," and that the event changed her "on a cellular level." As the actor explains, she shared these anecdotes to compare the constant alertness that women and non-binary people and journalists often share. As with all great anecdotes, though, hers just happen to involve Cher.
If you or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, call the National Sexual Assault Telephone Hotline at 800-656-HOPE (4673) or visit online.rainn.org.