If you're a pizza lover, you know that nothing hurts your soul like taking a bite that does not contain the appropriate ratio of crust to cheese. It's an immensely uncomfortable feeling — like when your sock gets stuck between your toes, but worse. Pizza Hut has the answer, with a new pizza that has cheese pockets. This isn't your father's stuffed crust, people. They're literal pockets. Like the kind of pockets that you'd put your car keys in, except the pockets are a pizza crust, and your car keys are cheese.
For a limited time only, Pizza Hut is offering the Ultimate Cheesy Crust Pizza, and they're not messing around. The crust is made of 16 pockets oozing with a delicious five-cheese blend combining mozzarella, provolone, white cheddar, asiago, and fontina. And because we're all clearly past the point of no return, you can only order the Ultimate Cheesy Crust Pizza in large, naturally.
In a press release, Zipporah Allen, Vice President of Brand Marketing and Consumer Insights, says, "The holiday season is for catching up with loved ones. The Ultimate Cheesy Crust Pizza is the perfect addition to upcoming holiday festivities, because we believe there are no better times than those shared over a fun and delicious meal together."
Do not underestimate the cheesiness.
They're like little bathtubs of cheese that have overflowed and spilled out onto the floor. Simply magical. In their press release, Pizza Hut says, "We can guarantee this pizza is our crowning a-cheese-ment and once you try it, it will forever have a pizza your heart." To be honest, they already won us over with their pizza puns; the cheesy crust is really just the cherry on top.
It doesn't end there, though. Pizza Hut is really feeling the holiday spirit, so they're sending out limited edition 'Tis the Cheese'n Holiday Starter Packages, which include all sorts of pizza-inspired goodies, like holiday cards, string lights, and even a pizza blanket. To enter for a chance to win, tweet the pizza emoji and the gift emoji, use the hashtag #TisTheCheesen, and mention @PizzaHut — because honestly, don't we all need new pizza string lights? (Yes.)
This isn't the first crazy Pizza Hut invention we've seen — not nearly. Don't forget that one time Pizza Hut Singapore came up with a pizza with two crusts: the outer one filled with mozzarella, parmesan, and cheddar, and the inner one filled with chicken sausage and more cheese.
Or that time the Middle East made their own pocket crust but filled each pocket with a cheeseburger, instead of just cheese.
Or that time Hong Kong used flying fish eggs and cream cheese for a crust stuffing. Or! New Zealand with their Marmite-stuffed crust...
...the Middle East with parmesan-coated cones stuffed with cream cheese and honey mustard chicken...
...and Mexico with their Doritos-covered crust.
Let's face it, friends: Pizza Hut has been toying with our emotions for years, and all around the globe.
And the hut isn't the only place who's played with pizza crusts. Domino's in Europe stuffed a hot dog in their crust, people in Japan sometimes add shrimp on top of theirs, and Domino's Taiwan played with peanut sauce and cheese in their crust, because apparently the answer to "What goes will with cheese?" is "Everything". (Everything, maybe, barring the toaster pastry cheese fiasco of 2017.)
Gone, gone, gone are the days of crust that's just plain bread. Gone are the days when "fancy" meant crust that had been buttered or sprinkled with garlic first. If you don't have a whole separate meal stuffed within your pizza crust, you're doing it wrong.