Spoilers for the May 2 episode of RHONY. Five episodes into a new season of Real Housewives Of New York, and we’re off to the races! The show, the most important in the franchise, obviously, has been around for long enough that it doesn’t have to pull any punches. And neither did Dorinda or Sonja when they fought, viciously, about death and divorce, being widowed and being alone in last week's episode. It was an ugly fight, but it will probably get worse, as Sonja and Ramona’s fight on Real Housewives Of New York revealed a new side to Sonja’s argument.
In case you missed it — Sonja and Dorinda got into a massive blowout at Luann’s Sag Harbor home because Sonja tried to equate getting divorced with losing a spouse to cancer. Then, instead of backing down or apologizing or just not having a really wrong opinion, Sonja doubled down, and the two women almost came to blows. Fast-forward to the rest of the cast taking sides, with basically everyone but Bethenny abandoning Sonja. Sonja isn’t without her problems — she loves to live in the past, and she has had a hard time moving on from her divorce, but, as Bethenny says, it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t need someone to talk to every once in a while. Sonja tells Bethenny that, during her blowout with Dorinda, there was one person at the table who could have refuted the charges Dorinda made about Sonja screwing around on her husband, and she didn’t. Instead, Ramona watched the Dorinda waves overtake Sonja, casting her out to sea.
Sonja’s opinion about death equating to divorce isn’t really right — having a spouse die isn’t the same as signing some papers and being done with a marriage. It’s literally life or death. But later, when Sonja finally confronts Ramona for not sticking up for her, viewers get a glimpse of just how alone Sonja feels in this group of friends. Ramona and Sonja have been friends for a really long time, with Ramona acting as a confidante for Sonja over the years. All Ramona had to say, according to Sonja, is a “that’s not true” when Dorinda accused Sonja of sleeping her way up and down the South of France. She just wanted a little bit of back up. She thinks that the housewives as a whole have left her out to dry, and all Sonja wanted in that moment was someone to stick up for her, just a little.
Of course, Ramona takes this conversation as well as Ramona takes any conversation that doesn’t celebrate her — she ratchets her voice higher and higher until all of Sonja’s arguments go unheard, drowned in the din of the room. This makes Sonja nervous and speak more irrationally, and the circle repeats itself — Sonja looks like the bad guy when she's just trying to say her piece. She wants to be included, and she wants to be respected.
So where does Sonja go from here? Everyone is mad at her essentially because she can’t explain herself. She basically needs Bethenny as a translator for the rest of the season because Bethenny hit it straight on the head — Sonja just wants to feel appreciated. She wants her trauma and sadness to be recognized, and she wants to feel a part of the group. Right now, the only one who is listening to Sonja is Bethenny. Not every opinion of Sonja’s is correct, and she’s not without her problems — but she just wants to be heard, and as it stands right now, the women of the Real Housewives Of New York are not giving Sonja what she needs to go on.