If you've been dating for a while, then you likely already know exactly what your partner needs to hear in the moments when they're feeling insecure, conflicted, and stressed out. A kind word or two, when dropped at just the right moment, can be all they need to feel better — and to know you've got their back. But what if you took it a step further, and catered those comments to your partner's zodiac sign?
By taking your partner's sign into account, you can come up with new ways to help your partner when they need your support. When looking to the stars for guidance, you may discover something your partner may need to hear regularly that you hadn't thought of before.
"Astrology not only helps you understand yourself and your partner's personality, it is a cosmic map of the soul," astrologer Valerie Mesa tells Bustle. "Taking a person's zodiac sign into consideration doesn't mean you're stereotyping. This is simply acknowledging their 'season' and purpose."
Is your partner someone who is a bit nervous, and in need of words of love and support? Are they a hard worker who could truly benefit from a little extra support? Then here are a few things you can say to them every day, in order to build them up.
1. Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Things to say: "You've got this!" "Way to go!" or "You're the best!"
By showing Aries support and encouragement, they'll feel like they can take on the world. "Ruled by red-hot fiery Mars, Aries is competitive, dynamic, and highly passionate," says Mesa. "Being the best means they win at life, and they've got no time to waste. Remind them of their courage and strength." And they'll feel truly unstoppable.
2. Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Things to say: "Nothing is going to change," "Look at everything we have," or "That was a good investment."
Taurus is all about loyalty and stability, so they'll appreciate comments that assure them things are goin' great. "I personally believe they are the most dependable in the zodiac, and they expect their partner to be the same," Mesa says. "It's not just the lavish life they crave, it's having security." And reminding them of what they already have can come as quite the comfort.
3. Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Things to say: "You are not your thoughts," "You make me laugh," or "What do you think of this idea?"
Gemini is the curious intellectual of the zodiac, which is why they crave "great conversation and light-hearted fun," says Mesa. "Gemini thrives on hysterical jokes, wit, and socializing." And the more they can be supported and valued for that, the better they'll feel.
4. Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Things to say: "You are safe," 'Tell me how you feel," or "You can trust me."
As a highly-sensitive sign, Cancer often needs to be reassured that things are OK. "Emotional and hypersensitive, this water sign hides in its shell and guards their heart and soul" says Mesa. "Be gentle with them —you won't regret it."
5. Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Things to say: "You are loved," "You bring me joy," or "You make me happy."
Leo loves to express themselves. And they love to brighten everyone's day with their jokes and antics. "This fire sign's main goal in life is to see others smile," says Mesa. So if they make a joke or tell a great story, definitely let them know you appreciated it!
They also loved to be loved. "Love is their oxygen and they have so much of it to give," says Mesa. "Give them the attention they need and crave."
6. Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Things to say: "Excellent job on this," "You're helpful!" or "How can we make this better?"
Virgo is the perfectionist of the zodiac, and that can have its positives and negatives — especially when it comes to dating. "Virgo is notorious for being overly critical and fussy," says Mesa. Reminding them that they did a great job can help make then feel acknowledged.
7. Libra (September 23 - October 22)
Things to say: "I can relate to everything you're saying," "No one is upset," or "Let's share!"
As an empathetic sign, Libra needs to be assured that things are going well in the relationship. "Ruled by the planet of love and beauty, this air sign wants to surround themselves with nothing but bliss and harmony," says Mesa. "They are constantly seeking balance within themselves, and they look for the same in their partner." So take time to listen and validate your Libra partner, and they will feel secure in your relationship.
8. Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Things to say: "I want to tell you a secret," "You can't go wrong with the truth," or "I feel your pain."
Since Scorpio often has a hard time being vulnerable, giving them permission to open up can really improve your relationship. And the same goes for creating a conversation about telling the truth.
"This water sign was born with X-Ray vision, and that could be enlightening but also terrifying," says Mesa. "They [may] see right through you, so don't give them small talk. They want to know your darkest secrets and deepest fears. Also, don't judge them. They might not tell you, but they've been through a lot."
9. Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Things to say: "Let's go on a trip!" "Life is an adventure with you," or "Don't stress!"
Dating a Sagittarius means having a life of fun and adventures. "This fire sign craves experience and adventure. Living life to the fullest, learning different languages, and traveling the world are among others in their giant bucket list," says Mesa. By showing your support — and suggesting fun ideas of your own — your partner will know you've got their back.
10. Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Things to say: "These are my goals," "I'm being serious with you," or "We will finish what we started."
Capricorn is all about practicality, which is why comments like these can come as a welcome surprise. "This earth sign is practical, determined, and 'textbook' in every sense of the word. They need to see to believe, and they don't have time for funny business," says Mesa. Being straight with your Capricorn partner will earn you major points.
11. Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Things to say: "You're unique," "What is your opinion on this?" or "You're entitled to your own opinion."
As the rebel of the zodiac, Aquarius will never grow tired of hearing that they're entitled to their own opinion, or get bored when people ask about their opinion. So talk to them and ask them questions. "Give them space but challenge their perspective," Mesa says. It'll likely make for interesting, relationship-building conversation.
12. Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Things to say: "This is so beautiful!" "I feel like I've known you my entire life," or "I feel what you feel."
If there's a sign that's artistic and empathetic, it's Pisces. "Pisces feels anything and everything," says Mesa. "This water sign needs their partner's attention and emotional validation ... Pisces thrives when their partner puts their guard down." So if you feel comfortable doing so, have a convo where you both really open up.
By taking your partner's sign into account, you can become that much more in tune with what they need to hear, so that they can feel loved and supported by you each day.