Why Some Women Love These Sex Toys

by Emma McGowan
Originally Published: 

The jury is definitely still out on on butt stuff for a lot of people. For people with penises, anal penetration makes total sense because of the prostate gland, which gets stimulated and — I’ve been told — feels amazing. In fact, according to sex toy brand LELO, prostate orgasms are 33 percent bigger than penile orgasms. But for people with vaginas, the appeal of anal stimulation is less immediately obvious. With no prostate gland to poke, what’s the point? Why do some women (and other people without prostate glands) like butt plugs?

Of course, not everyone with a vagina does like anal play. In fact, that goes for people of all genders. Like any other sex act, there are people who love it, people who hate it, and people who are just kind of “meh” about it. But contrary to popular belief, there are physical reasons why a person with a vagina might be into anal sex. Take, for example, the fact that the G-spot can often be stimulated through the wall of the anus.

"The anus and vagina share a mutual wall that is densely innervated by pelvic nerves," sex-positive pelvic health physical therapist, sex educator and counselor Dr. Uchenna Ossai, tells Bustle. "Using an anal plug can stimulate all of the nerves in that shared wall, activating pelvic floor muscle contractions that occur during orgasm."

One Reddit user asked the women of the r/sex community what anal toys or butt plugs feel like. “What do women get out of anal toys/ butt plugs?,” user Nuskies says. “Can women orgasm from anal and have any female redditors experienced that?” Here’s how self-identified women users of Reddit responded.


It Feels Like Double Penetration

Having a butt plug in during vaginal intercourse can help fulfill a double penetration fantasy, without the potential mess of a third person in the room. It can be a great way to live out that fantasy, without the hassle (and potential problems) that come with adding a whole other person into the sexual mix. Add some dirty talk or porn into the mix and you've got a seriously hot and sexy situation on your hands.

This user also says they like butt toys for dom/sub (dominant and submissive) play. They say that they always carry around a couple of butt plugs, in case their dom gives them an order to put one in.

If that surprises you, consider this: Keeping something that's normally pretty taboo on (or in) your person at all times can be a really sexy way to keep things hot with a partner. And while it's totally fine to walk around with a butt plug inside of you if that's what you're into, be sure to do it in a way that doesn't make other people feel uncomfortable or like they're participating in your sex life without consent. (In other words, keep it to yourself and your partner!)


It's Just A Little Somethin' Extra

Here's the thing: Anal doesn't have to be your absolute favorite thing in the entire world for it to contribute to your sex life. This user, for example, says they find that anal play can be a fun addition to vaginal intercourse or stimulation, but that on its own it's kind of... meh.

Having a variety of sex acts that you and your partner (or partners) can put in rotation is almost always a good idea. A lot of couples fall into a rut of doing the exact same thing again and again, which can lead to boredom and discontent. So having a few in there that you're not interested in doing every time or even on its own (but are down to do sometimes and with other sex acts) is a great way to keep things fresh, even years into a relationship.

In other words: There's still a lot of value in sex acts that don't lead directly to orgasm. Why not give them a try and see how it goes? After all, like this user, you don't have to do them every time.


It Feels "Fuller"

Some people, like this user, enjoy a "full" feeling when they're having vaginal intercourse and using a butt plug at the same time helps with that.

And while you might think that "full" means "painful," it's actually the opposite. Feeling "full" during sex usually means a person feels stretched to capacity, but not necessarily in pain. (And hopefully not in pain, unless that's something they're into!) When you use a butt plug during vaginal intercourse, you're quite literally fuller than you would be without one.

If that sensation is something that feels good to you, give a butt plug a try! It can be sexy to put it in before sex with your partner or have them put it in for you after you've already gotten going. Either way you do it, increased fullness is pretty much a guarantee.


It Feels Dirty — In A Good Way

For this user, butt play appeals from many angles (pun intended) but the fact that it feels dirty-in-a-good way is an absolute plus.

Ultimately, different people will have different experiences when it comes to anal toys. But if you and your partner are curious about butt play, know that there are tons of options out there and so many different ways to integrate it into your sex life.

This article was originally published on September 6, 2017 and was updated on June 3, 2019.

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