Very few people, if any, find relationships easy. We all deal with our own challenges, and one thing that influences which
challenges we deal with in relationships is our astrological sign. The good news is that, by understanding your astrology, you can also understand how to better navigate relationships. Deborah Graham, an astrologer, psychic, author, and TV and radio personality, believes one challenge many of us experience in relationships is meeting our spiritual match. She thinks we all have a soulmate we're meant to spend our lives with, as well as a number of other spiritual matches we're only meant to be with for a while. But between online dating and hookup culture, people are too often just focused on the physical, she tells Bustle. To find a spiritual relationship, she teaches her clients an affirmation: "I visualize somebody who makes me feel safe, somebody who makes me feel complete in my life, somebody I can share and be in a relationship for eternity."
Of course, though, forming healthy relationships requires far more work than reciting an affirmation. Here are the stumbling blocks you might run into when seeking and cultivating relationships and some ways to overcome them, according to Graham.
Aries (March 21 - April 19): Coming On Too Strong
Aries like to get to the point and don't want to play games or waste time. Their directness can be a breath of fresh air, but they also have to be careful not to take things too fast or make anyone uncomfortable.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20): Standoffishness
Tauruses' insecurities tend to come out the strongest in relationships, leading them to close off out of fear of getting hurt. But when their partners can get past their walls, it's worth it, because the Taurus experiences a level of trust and intimacy they rarely reach.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20): Coldness
Showing affection isn't exactly a Gemini's strong suit. This may make their partners feel unappreciated, and communication can become a struggle, so the couple should make a point to talk about their relationship regularly.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22): Overanalyzing
By picking apart their relationships, Cancers may procrastinate on joint decisions and even avoid commitment, leading their partners to run out of patience. It's important for them to understand that when two people are involved, they don't always have all the time in the world, and sometimes the wrong choice is better than none at all.
Leo (July 23 - August 22): Need For Control
Staying in control of everything is hard when you've got someone else to compromise with, and Leos don't like this. They need to learn to let someone else in, or their partners may start to feel unimportant.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22): Inexpressiveness
Hyper-rational Virgos aren't always in touch with their feelings, which can lead them and their partners to feel disconnected. They're also afraid of the spotlight, which makes them even harder to read. Those dreaded conversations where couples talk about their feelings are necessary for Virgos to achieve emotional intimacy.
Libra (September 23 - October 22): Overeagerness
Libras are quick to enter into relationships, but just as quickly as they fall in love, they can fall out of it. They need to get more comfortable taking it slow, because those relationships will be more lasting in the long run.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21): Jealousy
Scorpios want to be wanted, and if they don't feel like the most desired one in the room, they may lash out. While their partners can help them by showing extra affection, the affirmation they're seeking ultimately also needs to come from within.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21): Solitariness
Sagittariuses really like their independence, which can lead them to push their partners away. A Sagittarius's partner has to respect this need, and they have to reach a compromise where neither person feels neglected or smothered.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19): Manipulation
Capricorns' partners need to watch out for their manipulative tendencies. They may also get possessive, especially if jealousy arises. Both partners have to be extremely honest with each other and themselves to overcome this issue.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18): High Expectations
It can get exhausting to try to live up to an Aquarius's demands. But if their partners can see their feedback as an attempt to help them be better, they can benefit from it. In turn, relationships are an exercise in patience and forgivingness for Aquariuses.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20): People-Pleasing
Pisces like to try to "fix" other people, but underneath this need is a need to get to the bottom of their own issues and improve themselves. By taking out this desire on other people, they risk being taken advantage of.
All these weaknesses can also be strengths if you use them to your advantage, so make sure you and your partner are aware of them and actively working through them.