Is This The Best Type Of Sex?

by Kristine Fellizar
Ashley Batz for Bustle

A survey conducted earlier this year by Illicit Encounters, UK's largest married dating site, found that weekends are the most popular time to have sex. Saturday was the found to be the favorite day of the week by 42 percent of people, followed by Sunday (26 percent) and Friday (22 percent). I know a ton of people like to wait until the weekend comes to have sex. I get it. Weekdays are busy and filled with stress — two things that don’t exactly get you excited. Weekends are a time to chill and unwind, so getting in the mood can be much easier. But easier doesn’t always mean better. That's why weekend sex is kind of overrated.

“Just like eating your favorite meal prepared and served the same exact way every single day, it’s all going to get old fast,” Davia Frost, sex and intimacy coach and founder of Frosted Pleasure tells Bustle. “This is the same thing that happens with sex. We get tired of doing the same thing and want to add or try something new, without the feeling of routine sex. One thing I talk about with my clients which is now my motto, is that it's time to un-mute our desires and discover a whole new depth of pleasure that we seek.”

One way to “un-mute your desires” is to have sex when the mood hits. So waiting until the weekend to have sex is pretty overrated. Here’s why:

1. Sometimes Quantity Is More Important

Everyone likes to say it’s not about quantity, it’s about quality. While that’s true in a lot of cases, sometimes the opposite may be true when it comes to your sex life. “I believe quantity is sometimes more important than quality,” Dr. Kat Van Kirk, author of The Married Sex Solution: A Realistic Guide to Saving Your Sex Life and the resident relationship/sex expert at Adam and Eve tells Bustle. “Often if you've been waiting the whole week, there are certain expectations regarding extraordinary sex that may create unneeded pressure.”

2. Spontaneity Is Important

“Research suggests that spontaneity is an important part to maintaining a satisfying, long-term sex life,” Van Kirk says. “Many couples state that scheduled sex just gets too boring. Learning to have opportunist sex often proves to be more successful for building emotional and physical intimacy.”

So being spontaneous won't only help your sex life, it can bring you closer to your partner.

3. You Can Lose Momentum If You Miss Out On The Opportunity

There are only two days that make up the weekend. That’s not a large window of opportunity there. “If the weekend slips by, you may be out of luck until the next and in some cases lose momentum in keeping sex a priority,” Van Kirk says.

4. Expectations Can Lead To Disappointments

“One word that makes weekend sex overrated? Expectation,” Noni Ayana, M.Ed. Human Sexuality, Principal Consultant of E.R.I.S. Consulting LLC tells Bustle. Many times expectations can lead to disappointments. People have a tendency of building things up in their minds and reality shows them otherwise. If there’s little to no consistent foreplay throughout the week, the expectation of how the sex will be once you’ve “waited” for the weekend may just disappoint you. So don’t set yourself up for disappointment and don't wait.

5. Weekday Sex Is Highly Underrated

You have Monday through Friday. That means more days of the week to keep the momentum of your sex life going. As a bonus, a quickie in the morning can help boost your mood for your work day. “If you catch your partner during the middle of the week, the sex is totally unexpected, spontaneous, and possibly more satisfying,” Ayana says. “Plus, a couple of good orgasms can help relieve stress and anxiety, keeping you focused and productive throughout a demanding work week.”

A recent survey by fertility app, Kindara, found that 71 percent of women want to have more sex in 2017. One super easy way to do that? Stop limiting play time to only one or two days of the week. There are five other days to explore so take advantage and have fun.