Relationships
Solid one-liners to liven up the convo.
There’s nothing like a dating app to jumpstart your writer’s block. If you thought cranking out a 10-page school paper the night before it was due was tough, try getting an interesting conversation out of Alex, 28, three miles away. Amidst the sea of “Hey”, “K”, and other one-word messages, it feels impossible to get a full dialogue going with an online match. That’s why if you’re thinking about sending a witty response to a “what’s up” message on Tinder, Hinge, or Bumble, it can help to have some inspiration.
Perhaps bland, uninspired messages are part of the reason why dating apps are in their flop era right now, and why it’s so easy to catch the ick from your matches these days. Still, there’s no denying that the apps have made it a lot easier for singles to meet new people, so there’s no harm in swiping through your feed in hopes of meeting the one.
Because it can be intimidating to jump into a good convo, having some solid one-liners in your back pocket can make everything easier. So the next time you get a “What’s up?” on Tinder, feel free to refer back to this list of replies so you can have the last word.
1“Oh you know, just waiting for someone to send a funny first message for once.”
If you get the sense your match has a sense of humor, either from their photos or bio, try making a joke about the nature of their “What’s up?” message.
2“Well, I’m on here so clearly not my love life.”
If you’re looking for a hookup or something casual, get the word out there that you’re single and ready to mingle.
3“Who told you that’s my favorite first message ever? “
If you get the sense your match is nervous or didn’t know what to say, this joke makes light of the situation without putting anyone on the spot.
4“Because you’re cute, I’ll allow you a do-over.”
Every one knows a “What’s up” is a low-effort first message. Let them know you’re interested and set them up to make you laugh.
5“In this city? The rent!”
If you’re looking for a relationship or an actual date, not a come-over-to-bang date, start the conversation off wholesome and silly. You’ll get to check your match's vibe right away.
6“Hmm, a 3/10 first message. Do you want to try again?”
Sometimes a match just needs a little encouragement. Let them know there’s room for improvement.
7“OMG, a cutie just messaged me ‘What’s up,’ what should I say?... AH! Meant to send that to someone else.”
The “meant to send that to someone else” is a classic middle school move. If you get the sense your date has a good sense of humor, hit them with a double message.
8“Well, that pic of you at the beach is getting my heart rate up.”
If you’re looking for a hookup, complimenting their appearance shows you’re attracted to them and not sheepish about it.
9“Just enjoying the sites and sounds of Tinder.”
Talking about other profiles you’ve come across is an easy conversation started on Tinder. If you’re nervous or never know what to say on apps, try asking them about the strangest profiles they’ve seen.
10“Think my thumbs need a rest from swiping and typing. Wanna get drinks tonight?”
If you’re tired of matching and messaging and you’re ready to meet IRL, ask your date for drinks.
11“Oh you know, different day, same dating app.”
If you’re feeling tired of the apps, make a joke about it. Even the biggest extroverts get swiping fatigue. Your match will likely resonate with your feelings.
12“At Trader Joe’s. Need anything?”
Making a grocery store date is a super silly response to a first message that lets your match know you don’t take yourself too seriously. If you’ve been messaging for a few days, this joke will show your match more of your sense of humor — it may also give you deep insight into what snacks they like.
13“After this week, my caffeine intake.”
If you’ve been having a busy week, making a joke about it is a great way to open conversation about what’s been happening.
14“Honestly, I’m counting the minutes until it’s appropriate to drink wine.”
If you’re looking for a fun-loving date to go out with, let them know you’re down to party.
15“Seeing how long it’s going to take my roommate to notice it's her turn to buy paper towels.”
There’s no bonding like bad roommate bonding. If you’ve been messaging for a bit, this tells your match a little more about your life without going too deep.
16“Pretending to do work, but really swiping left and right.”
Making a joke about your job lightens the tone and opens the conversation to what you both do for money — and for fun.
17“Just getting my workout in on the Swipezone.”
If your match has a ton of gym pics, making a joke about your own exercise routine opens the convo into their interests.
18“Exhausted from looking at fish pics.”
If you’ve been chatting for a bit and you’re ready to meet IRL, let your date know you’re done with the apps.
19“How much time you got?”
Whether you actually tell them a long story about your demanding coworker or just use this to make a joke, this is a great vibe check-type question to see if someone’s down to chat.
20“That depends...do you dance in public?”
“That depends...” then asking something that’s a deal-breaker for you is a low-key way to talk about something you care about.
21“The price of alternative nut milks.”
Similar to a rent joke, making a joke about the price of something literally being up is a wholesome way to start a conversation.
22“I’m sure you say that to everyone.”
Don’t be afraid to be a little cheeky and call them out when necessary.
23“How did you know that’s the same line my grandfather used on my grandma?”
It doesn’t have to be true to be funny.
24“Is that how you charm all of your matches?”
You’re probably not the first person they’ve matched with, and depending on how the conversation goes, you might not be the last, either.
25“...And then they messaged me, ‘What’s up.’ Isn’t that romantic?... Sorry, just imagining how we’ll tell our friends and family the story of how we first met.”
This one’s a bit risky, so you might not want to pull it out unless you’re willing never to hear from the other person again.
26“Wow, you really know how to sweep a person off their feet.”
It’s a bit sassy, but the right person will appreciate a message like this.
27“Has anyone ever told you you have *such* a way with words?”
When it comes to boring messages, sarcasm is your best friend.
28“Come on, I know you can do better than that.”
Sometimes, all you need to do is apply a little pressure to make a match turn on the charm.
29“Congrats! You’re the fifth match to ask me that today!”
And I oop.
30“I’d love to know what made you swipe right on me.”
You’re on the apps for a reason, so you might as well cut right to the chase.
31“Don’t make me regret using my rose on you.”
Hinge roses aren’t given, they’re earned.
32“Why don’t I tell you over drinks tonight?”
It’s bold, but at least this way you can skip straight to an IRL meetup.
33“Too much to write it all out, but maybe I can tell you over dinner.”
If they’re not going to take charge, then you’re gonna have to step up to the plate.
34“Haven’t heard that one before.”
If they’re going to send a dull message, they should expect some sarcasm in return.
35“‘What’s up?’ On a dating app? Groundbreaking.”
When in doubt, you can always pull inspiration from The Devil Wears Prada.
36“Just waiting for you to ask me on a date.”
If it’s the truth, then don’t be afraid to go after what you want.
37“Message not delivered. Try again.”
This gives the other person a second chance at sending a message with more personality.
38“I’ll tell you what’s up if you can make me laugh.”
This way, you can get an idea of what their sense of humor is like.
39“I was gonna ask you the same thing!”
Throw the ball back in their court and see how they like it.
40“No offense, but your first message-game is weak.”
Tell it like it is.
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