6 Things You Can Only Get Away With When You Go Home As An Adult
Going home when you're an adult gives you a certain spread of behaviors that you can only get away with, as a grown up, at that particular time. There are some things that are well and truly out of bounds, like throwing a tantrum, which is and should always be reserved for your childhood self (if that). But then you are entitled to certain childish regressions as an adult going home, because let's face it, if nothing else, home brings out the child in us all. Especially if mum is there with cuddles and a fridge fully stocked with cold cuts.
Everyone has different habits they go back to when they're at home. I like to force everyone to do the daily newspaper quiz with me while I read the questions through mouthfuls of toast while sitting at the kitchen bench. It makes me feel like I'm in school again, and not 30 and stressed about dumb grown up stuff like bills and future babies. I also like to crop dust my brothers, but that's neither here nor there (what no, I don't do that, you said it not me). Anyway, here are some things you can only get away with when you go home as an adult:
1. Eating Straight Out Of The Fridge
Forgetting that things like "energy" can be "wasted" is the purview of children. When you're at home, it's the only time when, as an adult, you can stand with the fridge door wide open, eating straight out of packets and contemplating what you're going to eat next. Your parents will yell at you, and you will grudgingly close the door and have to think about what you want to eat without visual aids, but that's OK. It's the circle of life.
2. Sitting On Your Mum's Lap
As a fully grown woman, I'm not ashamed to say that I have sat on my mum's lap upon returning home. As a fully grown woman I am also not ashamed to say I am definitely sometimes still a wittle baybee.
3. Not Paying For Gas
I mean, it's not intentional. I don't have a car at home (considering you can't drive to Australia anyway), so I hijack my parents' cars when I need them.
4. Going On "Little Kid Diet"
Cake for breakfast? I mean, technically, you could do this at any time. But mostly you're trying to be a responsible adult. At your parents house? No problem. Feel free to scoop sugar onto your cereal.
5. Watching But Not Watching Scary Movies
I hate scary movies, but I sometimes watch them with my eyes closed with my parents and make them narrate. Because obviously that's less scary, and also the job of parents. And as everyone knows, parents are the only ones that can protect you from scary movie killers.
6. Sleeping In And/Or Napping A Lot
I don't know about you but I normally have to get up in the morning to do my job. And I have to be awake all day to do it properly. When at home, however, grown adults may sleep until 10 a.m., and nap again at 1 p.m., with impunity.