Ah, your first love: that special someone who stole your heart first, and if you're being fully honest with yourself, probably still has it. It's hard to forget the first person you shared yourself with emotionally (and most likely physically), and no matter who else comes in to your life, they'll always occupy that spot. Whether things ended with mutual respect, or a bang heard around the world (or at least by your neighbors) your first love is likely something you think about to this day. And for some, you may catch yourself thinking about that former special-someone a lot more than you'd like.
If you're anything like me, you'd probably wondered whether or not you could get back with your first love, and have things finally work out for the two of you; after all, it was so great back then, who's to say it couldn't be even better now? But how exactly do you know if it's right, or if you're holding on to something from the past that just isn't destined to pan out? Well, there are few signs you and your first love aren't done with your romance just yet. Here's how to tell.
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1. You Still Have Feelings For That Person, And They Likely Still Feel The Same About You
It may sound obvious, but if you're ready to rekindle the flame, and your former flame is not, chances are things won't go as planned. But if you catch yourself still wondering what that person is up to, and wishing you had them in your life then it most likely isn't over for you. The next step: find out if it isn't over for them, and figure out where to go from there.
2. You Can Still Openly Communicate About Things
This is not only important for any relationship, but extremely important for starting up again with the first person to grab your heart. If you can keep an open and honest dialogue, not only will you be able to share how you're feeling for one another still, but it can help you navigate how to continue on with things. Also, it'll help you get over those humps that you couldn't seem to overcome the first time.
3. You Find Yourself Thinking About Them When You're With Someone Else
This is major. If you've moved on with your life, and have dated other people, but your first is still on your mind, you're still feeling very strongly about them. It's even more telling, though, if that person still seems to occupy your mind if things are going well with other people. It's easy for us to default to the past when we're not happy with the present, but if the past is still lingering even when we're happy with our now, chances are we aren't done with it in some way.
4. You've Kept In Touch After All This Time
I've always believed that people are in our life for a reason; some will come and go, but those who are meant to be there will find a way to stay. If you and your first love are in pretty consistent communication, even though it's been years, and you guys have a pretty solid friendship, that's extremely telling. Whether or not you feel that there is a romantic possibility there is up to you guys, but if you're holding on to someone and they're still a major part of your life, it definitely could be the case.
5. Your Connection Has Grown Along With You
People will grow up, and grow apart. After a time away from each other, you'll start to have experiences outside of your life together, and as a person you'll change and evolve. But, if you find that despite having grown, you still care about and respect the person they have become, there is a longevity there that cannot be denied.
6. You've Always Known It Was Unfinished Business
If you guys ended because it wasn't the right time or place, you may have felt, “this isn't completely over.” Fast forward a few years, and your feelings of what could have been are still lingering, it may be time to finish what you started (or keep it going).
7. It Didn't Work Out Then, But You're In A Better Time And Place
This goes along with the whole “unfinished business” situation. Back then it may not have worked out because the odds were just stacked against you two, but suddenly you're both in a better place ready for a long-term relationship. If they're feeling the same vibes that you are, it's likely that now is your moment. Call me idealistic, but forces that aren't trying to keep you apart and are instead keeping you together are trying to tell you something.
8. Being With Them Is Natural, Even Though It's Been A While
Even though it's been a few years, starting up again may feel like you're picking up from yesterday. If everything comes naturally for the two of you, and you fall into a pattern of mutual respect and love, this is a person you are supposed to be with. They say the greatest relationships feature a melding of two people who will compliment each other. This isn't to say a relationship is work; it's always going to be work, no matter how well you guys go together. But if you feel like you're willing to deal with the good and bad, and being with that person just seems right to you, then chances are it is.
9. You Have A Gut Feeling
I'm a fond believer of trusting your intuition; I feel that whenever my gut is truly telling me something, if I follow it, things turn out well, and if I don't I almost certainly wish I had. If you have a good feeling about this person, and you have for a while after your relationship, trust it. The worst that can happen is you realize maybe it wasn't meant, but at the end of the day you'll feel so much better that you tried.
Images: Flickr/Susanne Nilsson; Giphy (9)