Was Kirk Leading Carly On? The 'Bachelor In Paradise' Breakup Was Even Worse Than It Should Have Been
Has everyone now recovered from Kirk and Carly's shocking breakup on Bachelor in Paradise? It's OK, I haven't either. The split seemingly came out of nowhere because most viewers thought this pair would be endgame, along with Tanner and Jade. So, what the heck happened? It turns out Kirk had been having second thoughts for an entire week and finally came clean with Carly as they headed into Fantasy Suite week when she scared him by talking about their future and having children together. In the "real world," I agree that would be intense after only a few weeks together. But, contestants come to Paradise with the end goal of finding a long-term relationship, so romances move at a different speed on the show. With this in mind, did Kirk lead Carly on in Bachelor in Paradise?
If he'd been having doubts for a week, then I'd say yes. According to Reality Steve, the show only filmed from June 4th through June 24th — so seven days was a really long time for Kirk to have second thoughts and not be honest with Carly. It was about a third of their entire relationship. We didn't see them much this season because their relationship was relatively drama-free, but Carly's words and actions indicate that Kirk also didn't give her any hints that he wasn't as invested in the relationship as she was. Not cool, Kirk!
Here's what went wrong:
Kirk Wasn't Honest With Anyone
Although Kirk was honest with Carly on their very first date that it takes him a long time to officially declare himself "in a relationship," he went on to tell the cameras that he was going to ignore his fears and follow his heart. And, his behavior going forward indicated that he was doing just that. He jumped into a relationship with Carly, even going on an overnight date, and seemingly didn't even look twice at any of the other women.
Kirk failed to tell Carly that his misgivings were ongoing, but he didn't discuss it with his friends, either — and I think they would have rightfully put pressure on him to come clean with her. As the couples prepared for their Fantasy Suite date, he told the other guys that he was probably going to break up with Carly. The producers then cut to an interview with Tanner, who told it like it was: "Kirk owed Carly more than this. To wait until the eleventh hour to break her heart is kind of an a**hole move."
I think if Kirk had talked to the other guys sooner about his second thoughts, they could have helped him work out his feelings and convinced him to do the right thing. I mean, really — does Kirk want his legacy to be the Bachelor in Paradise villain? We were all convinced that role was going to Joe, hands down.
His Behavior Was Immature
Kirk is 32 and has been in serious relationships before, so he really has no excuse for being dishonest for an extended period of time. Again, in the regular dating world, having misgivings for a week isn't that long and you probably should give yourself some time to sort out your true feelings. But, things move infinitely more quickly in Paradise, so Kirk needed to step up and be honest right away. Carly still would have been hurt and upset, but it would have been less heartbreaking if he hadn't waited until the last minute (aka the finale) to tell her that they weren't on the same page.
It Wasn't Cool To Disrespect Carly's Request For Privacy
While Kirk's intentions to explain himself to Carly may have been good, he repeatedly ignored her request for privacy and it was disrespectful. She'd just had her heart shattered in a million pieces, so of course she didn't want to talk to the guy responsible five minutes later. Tenley told Kirk multiple times that he shouldn't go into her room, and he ignored her, then he proceeded to disrespect Carly's wish to not speak with him — even though she clearly expressed it over and over again. Give a girl some space, Kirk!
Fans Are Rightfully Displeased With Kirk's Behavior
Does true love even exist? Tanner and Jade, you are my only hope.
Images: Rick Rowell/ABC (2)