Although breakups are never easy, sometimes the the reason for breaking up can make it feel even worse. For example, I broke up with my junior high school boyfriend because of his haircut and a friend of mine in college broke up with a girl because he was offended that she didn’t own any vinyl, as in records, but did own a record player. I mean, this seriously offended him, to the point that I imagine wherever he is today, he’s still bitching about it.
But, despite how ridiculous those two things sound, people have been dumped or dumped someone for probably even more absurd reasons. How absurd? Well, how does being dumped because you don’t know a certain band or because someone gave you up for Lent sound? Yes, that’s the type of WTF I’m talking about here.
Knowing that there was world of strange, but also legitimate reasons as to why someone would breakup with someone, I asked some Bustle readers to share their experiences on the topic. As usual, the answers did not fail to be entertaining, a bit sad, and somewhat enlightening, too. Here are nineteen real reasons why people have either broken up with someone or been dumped.
1. Britni, 30
"Someone once gave me up for Lent. It's my favorite party story. The worst part is that he didn't tell me until AFTER Lent. He just stopped returning my calls or texts. I thought he was ghosting me."
2. Jennie, 29
“A guy once broke up with me because of my music collection, namely the one Tory Amos CD I had. He wasn’t shy about telling me (and everyone else we knew) why either.”
3. Sarah, 35
"When I was 19 my boyfriend cheated on me with a nurse at the hospital where he worked. When I asked him why, he gave me this analogy: 'You know how Ramen is really great, but if you only eat Ramen, after a while you get bored of it? Your p*ssy is like Ramen.' And that was that."
4. Rachel, 24
"We were already on the outs, but then he shaved his head that sealed the deal. I don't know what it was about the shaved head that did me in, but that was the end. I locked myself in the bathroom and cried for an hour when I saw it and we broke up a week later. I will not lie; it wasn't the first time I broke up with someone for getting a haircut I didn't like."
5. Cate, 25
"When I was 16, I broke up with a dude for liking Sevendust. I am now 25 and I stand by that decision."
6. Sarah, 28
"He decided he deserved Rocket Scientist Barbie (even though he was far from Rocket Scientist Ken), instead of me."
7. Jen, 36
"In college, I felt trapped by the weight of her leg over my hips while she was sleeping."
8. Becky, 29
"A girlfriend in college pursued ME, then ended it because she had all this baggage from her Baptist family and thought she needed to be with a dude. She literally said to me 'If only you were a guy...' Because changing my genitalia is so easy."
9. Jill, 35
"I broke up with someone because they wore sunscreen, a visor, and long sleeves at the beach ― it just didn't seem to go with who I was. I actually don't use sunscreen and turn a different shade in the summer... and that's the way I like it."
10. Mieko, 30
"A guy had asthma and couldn't sleep on my down pillow AND couldn't stand my cat's fur... that was it."
11. Chelsea, 24
"I was dating a guy for several weeks when one day when we were at the beach I noticed that he had a yellowish tooth. I don’t know how I didn’t notice it before, but that’s all it took for me to end it.”
12. Colleen, 31
"In 2009, I was a titleholder in a fundraising organization to help GLBTQA kids get scholarships. Our parade float from the gay pride parade ― which we were going to re-enter in the fourth of July parade the following weekend ― was torched. Instead of letting that be the end of it I rallied with my friends to build a new one. The guy I was dating at the time ― who had met me IN a gay bar ― said 'This wouldn't have happened if they had stayed in their nightclubs where they belong.' That was the END of it."
13. Caitlin, 29
"This wasn't me, but a friend of mine broke up with someone because she realized he didn't own a pair of sneakers."
14. Casey, 31
"I once stopped dating a guy because he didn't know who Gogol Bordello was. I was on a real Russian punk kick, and couldn't fathom people who weren't."
15. Leigh, 27
"My college boyfriend broke up with me over my nose ring. I had always wanted one, he thought they were dumb, but I went out and got one anyway. He thought that was reason enough to end it."
16. Mandy, 35
“He was allergic to avocado and strawberries. How could I date a guy who couldn’t enjoy guac with me? If I enjoyed some guac without him, then I couldn’t kiss him for hours or his mouth would get all blistery.”
17. Lea, 28
"My first boyfriend liked Dungeons and Dragons more than me. I broke up with him... eventually."
18. Kathryn, 26
"I had been dating a guy for a few weeks when he revealed he didn't know what chorizo was. It became pretty clear we weren't going to work out. He obviously had no taste."
19. Kristine, 24
"I was also broken up with by a guy who felt like I was rushing too quickly into a physical relationship, which was not true at all. At that point, we like barely made out with tongue. Then again, I did meet him through my cousin’s Youth Group, which I didn’t think he was too serious about because he was always funny and cracking jokes at inappropriate times. Anyway, after he pretty much scolded me for being a harlot, he then told me, 'If God wanted us to be together, we would be.' I guess God didn’t want us to be together. "
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